This year I signed up for and attended a weekend wellness event. Runningman Festival is an annual three-day immersive health, wellness, and endurance event - basically an adult sleep away camp for fitness and wellness enthusiasts. It takes place in Rome, GA at Kingston Downs (a vast wide open field in the middle of nowhere seemingly, reminded me of the desert if I am honest lol). Day 2 of the event is an optional 5k/10K/Half Marathon/Full Marathon - choose your adventure (or just walk / don't do any of the above). While marketed that it's a wellness event with a race included, most of the participants are attending to run.
For me, personally, I was more interested in the connection first - planning a girls weekend with friends to attend a health and wellness event sounded like something my soul needed this year. On another level, I liked the idea of having something to work toward, with a timeline for discipline, and maybe complete one more race. I've completed several 5k's, although I've never been an avid runner just someone who has had seasons of enjoying the sport. Early in the year I suffered a high hamstring injury and had been slowly rehabbing that all year. Hamstring rehab is no joke! Anywho - I considered that, along with what I truly aspired to achieve for myself, to set my goal and then registered for the 5k. My friends, they were all signing up for 10K and above - and I was excited for them. I didn't feel that stir in my soul to try to achieve that in the short amount of training time we had and with all that I had going in life, nor did running a really long distance signal anything in my soul. Just being honest.
Training was definitely rough and I struggled getting all of my runs in. My hamstring injury was flaring back up and I was even having some aches from an old wake surfing injury present. Life handed me one curveball after another as it does (the passing of my grandmother, the hospitalization of my mom, and some other super fun life lessons) but I did my best to prepare. I started to realize what I had signed up for as training landed in the middle of summer in south Florida and I was fighting to get out before it was too hot (but also not too early where the noseeums would eat me alive). Spoiler: I am still covered in bites and it was always too hot to be running outside. A yoga studio never did me dirty like this.
Race day arrived. I will be fully transparent with you: I woke up in a tent (yes, me, in a tent) after thinking I might die in the heat the day before. *Fun fact: I could actually die because as it turns out I have a genetic condition that indicates I should avoid conditions/activities like this - but ill leave that as a footnote because its not the story we are talking about here. So, as I was saying, I woke up in a tent after a terrible nights sleep, puffy / inflamed / irritated, and I looked at my friends and I was like "I don't even think I am going to run today." Now, understand my underlying health condition this would have been a fair decision, but also - in that moment - I was like ICK! You signed up for this event, you set your goal, you're here .... seriously? So I took myself for a walk (to the air conditioned portable restrooms/showers) to clear my head and have a little 1:1 with myself. Ultimately, I decided I would run because for me a 5k was doable and I knew that, but also because I was tired of this version that would make promises to herself and then break them so easily. Ok, but enough about that because that isn't the focal point of this story either.
So I completed my 5k. Most people ran, some people walked, some did walk/run intervals. Most people achieved the goal they set for distance. Some people didn't. One of those people is the inspiration for this story and our conversation later that day really solidified an observation I've had in my career of small business consulting.
You’ll never truly experience winning if you’re always running someone else’s race.
Now, first I want to tell you that this individual is a powerhouse in her field. She's set an incredible example in life, in the business she has built, and the way she has shared her experience along the way. She's been fearless - taking chances, figuring things out along the way. She's experienced wins and losses so she's no stranger to the courage and risk it takes to be great. That said, I've observed a trait that I think will be a game changer for her (observe - identify - present is what I do best).
She was beating herself up midway through the day, because she completed the same distance as the year before but did not accomplish the new goal set for this year. As I do, I asked some questions about it - exploring her thought process on why she thought that was. We talked about the training process, about the conditions of the day and how she was feeling, and then I dug into my favorite part which was discovering WHY she set the goal in the first place. And after a few excavating inquiries and many reasonings, the real answer ultimately came out. She cherishes the time spent with a friend, and that friend (maybe you guessed it) is a long distance runner! She's a goal getter, high endurance, got something to prove type of athlete. Before I finish, let me add this little anecdote. I think it is so important to surround ourselves with like-minded people, particularly those who are achieving more than us - especially the things we aspire to - because we are the sum of our circle.
There are levels to why we aspire to things, whether it be in business, in fitness, in relationships. Getting to the WHY beneath the WHY beneath the WHY is the key and a main component of my work in the world.
Let's hypothetical the scenario: You're inspired by someone who completes a marathon. They posted these really amazing recap reels of the race last year, their medals, all the people around them celebrating completing their goal. It looks like an incredible accomplishment and so much fun. You really look up to them and think to yourself - I'd like to have that too. Hey, that is great! Aspiring to new things is a wonderful thing and I am not knocking that. Here is what I am offering: A superficial why will always leave you feeling disappointed. In this scenario, there was no discovery process in deciding to also run a marathon. No deeply seeded purpose to keep you motivated on the days when training feels hard and heavy. No rooted motivator within your soul that helps you wake up a little earlier, bandage the blisters, keep your nutrition on point, enroll accountability partners, and stick to the training plan. Because it was never that deep for you.
I find this to be true with my clients as well: Either that business growth goal was never actually yours, or it is yours and you do not have the capacity to hold it yet.
Some business owners I speak to will tell me "I want to have million dollar years." Awesome! What inspired that goal? How did you develop that amount? What will that do for your business? What will that do for you? How will that impact your family? What will that do TO you? And what will THAT do to you? What sacrifices will that require? What additional team members will you need to hire? Do you know someone that's achieved it? What did it cost them? I could go on, but I wont. I think you get the gist.
Be inspired by someones journey, not replicate it exactly. Study how they got their results and then go within yourself and ask which parts make sense for you. Understand what comes with it: the good, the bad, the happy, the sad. Then develop the rest of your personal dream and set those goals. Set yourself up for personal success. Make sure you're following your true north. Otherwise, you'll fall short, you'll fail, and you'll waste precious time beating yourself up over failing at a goal that wasn't ever really yours to begin with. Your unique gifts and talents - your unique calling - your passion and purpose.
The world needs you to show up fully, authentically, and aligned. Embody your personal power!
With love,
Nicole @ The Embody Shop
*In case you're wondering what I mean by "my genetics": I carry a confirmed variant for malignant hyperthermia, which is a fancy way of saying my muscles don't handle heat and hard exertion the way most people's do. Add CIRS, an inflammatory condition tied to my HLA-DR genes post mold exposure, and heat becomes something I have to plan around rather than push through.