Hey Leg’Ends,
You know the deal by now. Satirical Planet News is free to read and it is staying that way. No paywall, no adverts trying to sell you insurance between paragraphs about fascism. Just two idiots with keyboards, caffeine and a low tolerance for bullshit.
Our Goal For 2026
This year is going to be even more unhinged than the last. The bullshit radar is already twitching. Our plan is simple.
Keep exposing the people who think they are untouchable.
Keep following the money, the lobby groups and the spin.
Keep turning their nonsense into something you can actually read without losing the will to live.
We are going to do this anyway. Your backing decides how deep we can dig and how loud we can be.
What We Have Already Done Together
Since 1st September we have produced 409 articles, all free to read. That is 409 pieces of satire aimed squarely at the status quo. In that time you have racked up 98K plus views and there are now 543 of you following along.
For something that started just over a few months ago, that is a serious amount of attention. It tells us one thing very clearly. You see the same madness we do, and you keep coming back because this helps you make sense of it.
Why This Is Not Normal Free Tat
Normally, free stuff is cheap, half arsed or a clickbait crap. Satirical Planet News is not that.
We put out top tier content with receipts in the links, so you can check the source, not just the punchline. Some nights it is us, a cold cup of coffee, twenty tabs open and the creeping sense that the country is being run by a marketing focus group. Then we hit publish, you lot pile in, and it feels like a small act of sanity.
You are not being thrown scraps. You are getting the full meal, free at the point of reading.
What You Are Funding
Everything stays free, whether you ever pay or not. If you do decide to support, here is what you are actually powering.
Time for proper deep dives, not just hot takes.
Independence, so we do not have to soften anything to keep sponsors happy.
A space where people allergic to bullshit can gather without someone shouting “like and subscribe” every four seconds.
If that sounds like something you want more of, here is how you can back it.
☕ Buy Us a Coffee: A one off caffeine donation to keep the rants flowing. You can chuck in £1, £1,000 or £100,000 if you really hate your bank balance. Every bit goes into time, tools and caffeine, not yachts.
💸 Go Paid: Subscribe for £8 a month or £80 a year. Think of it as your season ticket to trouble, and a way of underwriting free access for everyone who cannot pay right now.
How You Can Amplify It
You are already part of those 98K plus views that show this is hitting the mark. If you want to push it further:
Help us grow the crew towards 1,000 active Leg’Ends.
If you liked the article, send it to a friend or repost it on whatever platforms you use. Word of mouth beats any algorithm.
Why Support At All
Because if we leave the narrative to the usual suspects, the people who broke everything will keep writing the story about how it was inevitable.
Backing this work means:
More fearless, fact checked satire aimed upwards.
Less space for bad actors to hide behind slogans.
A small but real reminder that not everyone is swallowing it.
To the Leg’Ends who have supported us via subscriptions and coffees, thank you. When we started this thing, we honestly thought it would just be Willy shouting into the void and Bill arguing with a blank screen. Instead, you turned up, chipped in, and proved this mad little project was worth the sleepless nights and cold coffee.
You are the reason we can keep this free, keep it sharp, and keep kicking upwards. We do the ranting, but you are the ones who make it possible.
None of this works without you reading, sharing and, if you choose, backing it.
Stay warm. Stay loud. Stay allergic to bullshit.
Willy & Bill
Everything here is free to read, and it stays that way.
If you want to keep Satirical Planet ad free and Bill caffeinated, you can:
☕ Buy a coffee – a one off thank you from £1
💸 Go paid – become a Leg’End funding the chaos so everyone else can read for free
Help us reach 1,000 Leg’Ends so Willy stops nagging Bill to write “just one more” Reform piece and let the man sleep occasionally.
You are part of the 94K+ views that prove this satire is hitting the mark.
Not subscribed yet? 👉 Subscribe here to get Satirical Planet News free to your inbox. It costs nothing, except a small piece of your remaining sanity.
If money’s tight, ignore the links and just share the article. The paying Leg’Ends are already covering you.
Disclaimer: Based on real events, presented through satire. No allegation of illegality is made. Public record facts are blended with satirical commentary for humour and critique. Full legal here.