A BIRTH THAT WASN’T CELEBRATED:
She was born in a small town in Tamil Nadu, where traditions were older than dreams and expectations were heavier than love. The day she arrived, there were no loud celebrations, no sweets distributed with pride. Instead, there were silent sighs. A girl child. Her parents, especially her father, had hoped for a son. When her brother was born years later, the house overflowed with happiness. For her, affection was measured and conditional. For him, it was endless and proud. She grew up understanding that love in her house had different rules for different genders
STRICT WALLS, SOFTER HEART:
Her parents were strict, not protective, but controlling. Every move was questioned. Every smile was monitored. “Girls shouldn’t laugh loudly.” “Girls shouldn’t talk too much.” “Girls shouldn’t dream too big.” These sentences became the background music of her childhood. She watched her brother roam freely, make mistakes, and still be defended. But she was judged for breathing too freely. Slowly, she learned to silence her excitement and shrink her presence.
A NEW STATE, A STRANGER’S WORLD:
When the family moved to Uttar Pradesh for her father’s work, she thought maybe life would change. Maybe a new place would mean a new beginning. But UP felt unfamiliar and intimidating. The language sounded different. The streets felt louder. The stares felt sharper. In school, she struggled to adjust. Her Tamil accent made her feel exposed. She smiled politely, but inside, she felt like an outsider in every room.
FRIENDS WHO SLOWLY DISAPPEARED:
At first, she tried to make friends. She tried blending in, adjusting her tone, changing her style. But friendships became temporary. Some left without explanation. Some distanced themselves when she couldn’t “fit in.” Group chats excluded her. Secrets were shared without her. Slowly, she stopped trying too hard. The classroom felt crowded, yet she felt alone. Being surrounded by people doesn’t guarantee belonging.
BATTLING HER OWN BODY:
As she grew older, she faced “girly” health issues.. painful periods, hormonal imbalance, mood swings she didn’t understand. But there was no safe space to talk about it. At home, such topics were uncomfortable. “Don’t overreact.” “All girls go through this.” That was the only advice she received. She Googled her symptoms late at night, scrolling through answers that scared her more. She wanted reassurance not dismissal.
A RELATIONSHIP FULL OF QUESTIONS:
Then came a relationship. At first, it felt like she had finally found someone who listened. Someone who cared. But slowly, confusion replaced comfort. Mixed signals. Emotional distance. Words that hurt more than silence. She began questioning everything.. his love, his intentions, her worth. She blamed herself for every argument. “Am I too much?” “Am I not enough?” Thousands of questions filled her mind, but she had no one to discuss them with.
THE FEAR OF TRUSTING MEN:
Growing up in a society where girls are constantly warned to “be careful,” she developed a fear of trusting men. News stories, street comments, uncomfortable stares, they all built invisible walls around her heart. Even in normal conversations, her mind overthought every word. Was he being genuine? Was there a hidden motive? The world felt unsafe. Her thoughts tortured her more than reality sometimes did.
SELF-DOUBT: THE SILENT ENEMY:
Loneliness became her constant companion. Not just physical loneliness, but emotional isolation. She began doubting her own voice. Her decisions. Her feelings. She would replay conversations in her mind a hundred times, wondering if she said something wrong. She compared herself with other girls.. prettier, more confident, more loved. Social media made it worse. Everyone seemed happy. Everyone seemed chosen. She felt invisible.
FIGHTING BATTLES NO ONE SEES:
Yet, every morning, she wakes up and goes to college. She studies. She smiles when required. She submits assignments on time. She pretends she’s fine. Inside, she’s fighting battles no one knows about.. battling insecurities, unanswered questions, emotional wounds, physical pain, and societal pressure. She has learned to cry quietly, wipe her tears, and continue.
STILL STANDING, STILL STRUGGLING:
She hasn’t figured everything out. She still struggles. She still overthinks. She still feels scared to open up completely. But she hasn’t given up. Even when love felt unequal, even when friends disappeared, even when her own family didn’t understand her... she chose to survive.
Maybe she isn’t strong because she doesn’t feel pain.
Maybe she’s strong because she feels everything… and still moves forward.
Her story isn’t about perfection.
It’s about endurance.
And somewhere between Tamil Nadu and Uttar Pradesh, between silence and self-doubt, she is slowly learning one important truth.
She deserves love.
Even if she has to first learn to give it to herself.