Saturday, October 19, 2024
How the "Hundred-Dollar Holiday" changed my perspective on gift-giving.
"Refreshing in its honesty and reliable in its guidance . . . a charming, inspirational and authoritative primer on money management."
- Better Investing
What is the "Hundred-Dollar Holiday"?
Quoting Spend Well, Live Rich, pg. 17:
"Here's a radical but effective way to cut your spending around the holidays. Join the 'Hundred-Dollar Holiday' movement. The mission of this movement is simple. Each family tries to spend just $100 on gifts for Christmas. You don't have to reread that sentence. Your eyes didn't fail you. I said spend just $100. And, yes, that includes presents for your children."
DON'T FREAK OUT!
Another quote from Spend Well, Live Rich, pg. 18-19:
"Okay, so a $100 Christmas may be too extreme for you. Each family should set a realistic goal based on their finances. But the point is to stop saying you want to scale back and actually do it. Try to think of things to give people that they really need.
…
Remember this: Some studies show that it takes six months before many people pay off their holiday shopping bills."
DON'T FREAK OUT!
Last quote from Spend Well, Live Rich, pg. 17:
"…the 'Hundred-Dollar Holiday' isn’t about being a Grinch. When the movement was begun by New York writer Bill McKibben and a few of his friends…[they] wanted to inspire families to find an alternative to the commercialism of Christmas.
In a poll by the Center for a New American Dream, a third of all parents interviewed reported that they worked more hours during the holidays to earn more money. … They take precious time away from their family to buy more stuff."
STORY TIME
Bouncing off of the second quote regarding the $100 being too extreme, motives behind gift-giving could be why someone might not be too keen on the idea.
When I had this discussion with my partner, I wanted to cut back on Christmas spending to not only save money, but because I hated forced gift-giving. And forced receiving.
I don't need a gift on Christmas. I don't need a gift on my birthday. And I, also, don't need to be forced into a situation where I have to act like I like the gift so as to not offend the gifter, which is EXHAUSTING, by the way.
And they wouldn't be in the situation of my possibly not liking the gift had they paid any attention to my interests; blanket statement, it actually hasn't happened in a while.
Doesn't stop it from being a concern.
Gift-Receiving is NOT one of my love languages (a problematic topic for a later post), but if someone feels they MUST get me something, because their love language is Acts of Kindness, then they can get me a Visa and/or Steam Gift Card so I can get myself whatever I want. Are we friends on Steam? Look at my Wishlist and send me something from there.
My love language is, also, Acts of Kindness, and I'm my most miserable, and stressed when I feel I'm "forced" into gift-giving
But when I've been spontaneous with my gift-giving, I get looks and told I need to be saving my money.
Which was true, but when Christmas rolled around, the "save money" mindset seemed to go out the window. Also, "The best gift we can give our friends and family is our time."
My lovely honey didn't see it that way; and I realized during the conversation I went into it without necessary information:
He's never felt forced to give gifts at Christmas, for one. And, for two, because we never really discussed money (a mistake all couples make at some point), he was managing to spend around $300 at Christmas.
Like me, he sees gift-giving as a form of connection. And there are relatives he doesn't see as often as he would like, so, when he hears about how much their gifts are loved, he feels great.
Buying gifts is a way he gets to be part of their lives since it's not likely he'll get another chance.
He also apologized for giving me looks when I gave him a spontaneous gift, which he doesn't remember doing (ADHD, like me), and advised he's never not appreciated a gift, spontaneous or otherwise.
So, we concluded, we don't need to change our spending habits around Christmas, since we don't go nuts, and started planning for the holidays. I told him I prefer gift cards. And he was fine with that.
Like he said, "I know it's cliche but it's the thought that counts when you can't spend the time"
(The conversation was via text because it's what my Autistic self is most comfortable with.)
In the end, we were glad I checked out Spend Well, Live Rich from the library because it resulted in us having one of the most important money discussions we ever had.
Well, this is all for now!
Thank you for reading.
May every decision you make be in the spirit of fairness and may the rest of your day NOT go to $#!7!
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