So, here we are again! Back in the diary! I realize I still haven’t developed the consistency necessary to turn this into an actual series or daily post. (Or even a weekly post for that matter.)
I digress, let’s digest the day.
I don’t know if you all are aware of the wilderness season that Believers go through, but I can’t concisely explain it here. If you want a thorough masterclass of what I’m talking about, just read the book of Exodus. Now it’s obviously 2026 so the wilderness I’m experiencing is nothing compared to what the Israelites experienced on their way to the Promised Land, however I still feel like I’m in the wild without a map or a plan and I’m just out here screaming “SOMEBODY HELP ME!!! TELL ME WHERE I’M GOING AND WHAT I NEED TO DO TO GET OUT OF HERE!!!’ And by someone, I mean ‘LORD HELP!!’
Basically, I’m in a season of major transition and I have no idea what’s going on and what my role in all of this is supposed to be. When I say transition, I mean like every single facet of my life is changing around me. Relationships, family dynamics, work, church, finances, my identity as Dinnie in Virginnie, resources, passions and interests, like legitimately everything seems to be changing.
Now if you really know me, you’d know that I’m not exactly the biggest fan of change. I can be a very diligent worker when I have a system and I know what I’m in for but the second something goes awry it’s like my brain breaks and I go into panic mode. I’m a big fan of predictability and comfort and if you know anything about God at all, you know that is absolutely not how He operates in our walk with Him.
Thus, I’ve kind of been in a season of being sat down. It’s like everything I want to do, I’m not allowed to do. Everywhere I want to go, I can’t go. I see events all the time that I want to go to and no matter how much I plan or check my schedule it’s like I’m being blocked from everything. It’s been so frustrating because it’s like, ‘Am I not allowed to do anything anymore?’
Either I don’t have the means to get there physically (no car and public transportation in Hampton Roads just isn’t at the level I would need to get where I need to go), I don’t have the resources (aka money) to get there or to enjoy being there (there’s been quite a few coffee shops and restaurants I just can’t afford right now), or there’s a conflict of interest (either there’s something with family, work, or church that I know I need to dedicate that time to instead). It’s like all of my plans fall through.
Every. Last. One of them!
Needless to say, it's been very frustrating. It’s been frustrating in my personal life and it’s been frustrating as Dinnie in Virginnie.
So what’s the solution? Well, it’s just to stay focused on Jesus. Ultimately, the Lord has been teaching me over and over and over again that I’m not in control. I’m not in control of the little things or the big things. My life isn’t my life anymore and I have to accept that. I have to learn to be content with where He has me and trust in His plan over my own. If everything is getting blocked right now, there must be a reason. The Lord opens and closes doors so I must learn to rejoice in both the doors He has opened and the doors He has shut.
I think one of the most difficult things in this wilderness season is not giving up on the dream and vision He has given me as Dinnie in Virginnie. I’ve been discouraged and uninspired to the point of just not even posting or writing or planning at all. I wrestle with a love-hate relationship with social media because I want to be a producer and yet I overconsume. It’s something I still struggle with and am still asking the Holy Spirit to help me overcome because I don’t want to idolize social media.
There’s so much love I have for this state and the people all around me and I just don't know how to display it or package it in a way that honors God and truly showcases how to view this state as someone who truly believes ‘Virginia is for Lovers’. I’m just a bundle of confusion right now and that’s causing me to just spend all my time lost in thought and longing, but taking no action.
This should really be a season of preparation. A season of forming good habits. A season of stewarding what I already have. A season of learning and perfecting new skills. A season of trusting in His plan no matter what is going on around me. A season to focus on Christ.
There’s a lot of unknowns around me right now but I must remember that He is faithful.
I love Virginia and I know He brought me here for a reason, I know He gave me Dinnie in Virginnie for a reason, and I know I’m in this wilderness season for a reason. I pray I learn the lessons I’m meant to learn and grow and mature as a result.
Dinnie out! 09.26.26
Luke 12:31
31 But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.