When the chips are down.......In a long and shambolic career as a bum, hobo, nomadic fool...I have had plenty of low points. too many to mention really but i believe that challenges accepted, whether or not they are successful, are part of my language, my DNA i suppose.
With a song in my heart *downbeat, ragged gypsy miserablism intensifies* I wander, stumbling over myself and the tools I need to survive. I tend to stomp right along, through crossroads designed to make one pause, leaving solutions and practicalities along the road like so much truckstop debris.
broken teeth and busted knees, shattered heart and bleeding feet. off i go like a wild eyed john the baptist spraying jism on cave walls and grafittied bathroom stalls.
As i wrap my befuddled head around the unthinkable reality of a war in which my friends are currently in the midst of I also find myself once again at one of those crossroads.
There had been a plan...as much as a plan could be in a cobbled together in a furious moment of dumb nobilty kind of way.
like so many other plans they changed or rather were pissed into a sea of ideas that constantly surged and battled and became something else. the same but different.
so here i am in yet another totally Thats so fucking Dean moment its actually parody at this stage.
struggle, obstacle, chaos and emotional havoc. these have been my unknowing touchstones as i reached for their opposites. Today i take a break and sniff the air. cut my toenails. Is it time for new wayward plans? is it time to quit the madness? When the chips are down.....is it time to flee the casino? or grit the teeth in defiance one more time.
Slava Ukraini