https://youtu.be/Ha-oCQIeznQ?si=7x-UtOhf7ePbN8IJ
There have been many times in my life when things did not go the way I hoped.
I have experienced failures. I have faced difficult circumstances. I have struggled financially.
And there are things I have done in my life that I am not proud of.
I won't go into the details.
Some things are too personal to share, and some stories involve other people whose privacy I also want to respect.
But I carry the lessons from those experiences.
There were times when, because of my circumstances, I made decisions that I wish I could take back.
There were people I took advantage of.
There were things I did that, looking back now, I know were wrong.
And for a long time, I carried those things with me.
Sometimes, we can be very good at asking God to forgive us, but not so good at accepting that forgiveness.
We say, “Lord, forgive me.”
But then we continue punishing ourselves for the same mistake years later.
We replay what happened.
We ask ourselves what we could have done differently.
We allow our past to convince us that we are no longer worthy of God's love.
But today's Gospel reminds me of something difficult and beautiful.
Jesus tells us to love our enemies, to do good to those who hurt us, to bless those who curse us, and to pray for those who mistreat us.
And then He tells us:
“Be compassionate as your Father is compassionate.”
That word—compassion—made me think about myself.
If God is asking me to show compassion to others, I also have to learn how to receive His compassion.
That doesn't mean pretending that what I did was right.
It doesn't mean forgetting the people I may have hurt.
And it certainly doesn't mean avoiding responsibility.
It means acknowledging what I did, learning from it, asking God for forgiveness, and allowing His mercy to change me.
There are people whom I know I have wronged.
I am not yet ready to face them personally.
I am not yet ready to ask them for forgiveness face-to-face.
And I know that someday, I may have to find the courage to do that.
But for now, I have placed those people and those mistakes before God.
I pray for them.
I pray that God will heal whatever pain I may have caused.
And I pray that, when the time comes, He will give me the courage to face them and sincerely ask for their forgiveness.
Until then, I can begin with what I can do today.
I can change.
I can choose differently.
I can stop repeating the things that I know were wrong.
I can become a better person because of the lessons those mistakes taught me.
God's mercy is not asking me to remain trapped in the person I once was. It is inviting me to become someone different.
There is a difference between guilt that keeps us imprisoned and repentance that leads us toward change.
I don't want to use my past as an excuse.
But I also don't want to spend the rest of my life being punished by it.
I want to learn from it.
I want to make amends when I am able.
I want to ask forgiveness when the time is right.
And most of all, I want to believe that God's mercy is bigger than my failures.
Because if Jesus asks us to forgive others, I believe He also wants us to understand the freedom that comes from receiving His forgiveness.
So today, I am learning to say:
“Lord, I cannot change what I have done. But I can give it to You.”
I cannot undo the past.
But I can choose what kind of person I will become because of it.
And I can trust that God's mercy is not an invitation to remain the same.
It is an invitation to begin again.
Maybe there is something in your own past that you continue to carry.
Maybe you have already asked God for forgiveness, but you still cannot forgive yourself.
Today, bring that burden to the Lord.
Take responsibility for what needs to be repaired.
Make amends when it is appropriate and possible.
But do not allow shame to convince you that you are beyond God's mercy.
Let your mistakes teach you.
Let them make you more compassionate.
Let them make you more careful with other people's hearts.
And let God's grace make you a better person than the person you were yesterday.
Take a quiet moment.
Think of something you have been carrying for a long time.
Bring it before God.
You might simply say:
“Lord, You know what I have done.
You know whom I have hurt.
You know what I regret.
I cannot change the past.
But I surrender it to You.
Give me the courage to make amends where I can.
Give me the humility to ask forgiveness when the time comes.
And give me the grace to accept Your mercy and begin again.”
Then be still for a moment.
Let God meet you there.