Struggling with mental health is taxing, frustrating, and at times a lonely ordeal. Days can go by without a glitch, then something personal happens, and the inner being seems to cave. We want to be heard, seen, and believe that during those dark moments, there is help.
It doesn’t seem to work out that way. In our moment of darkness, the light switch turns off. Emotions or sometimes lack of them, take over and the feeling of drowning begins to take over. Irritation hits, every little thing puts one on edge, ready to snap.
One slight thing goes wrong, boom, the anger rises. If things continue to keep going askew, the anger becomes a full-blown rage monster. Now at this point, nothing will calm the mind other than going to a quiet place, locking oneself inside. Is that the correct remedy? Who knows.
I know that is what I must do to get back to a clearer thought process.
It took years of on/off therapy to learn coping skills. Coping? I want to eventually overcome my mental health issues, not simply cope. Coping all these years leaves me feeling that this is it. An endless struggle to keep coping so I can exist.
What is life like to not constantly be on guard? I want to not deal with the endless barrage of panic attacks, anxiety, depression, and worst of all suicidal ideation that loves to creep up.
One of my therapists told me once, that we are given tools on how to survive. We go to therapy to learn how to use those tools so we can overcome mental health issues. There is some truth to it.
Mental health is deep and complicated. I know individuals who take medications to help calm the brain. It works for them. I’ve been on medicines for mental health, which made my symptoms worse. The case worker took me off of them.
An important part of dealing with mental health is seeking therapy. Whatever therapy entails, whether individual, group, or hospitalization, getting help is crucial.
Mental health is a day-by-day event. When days go relatively smoothly, it is a blessing. On dark days, life seems to hit wave upon crashing wave. The important thing to remind oneself, the struggle may feel lonely, but we are not alone.