Red Hot.

Jan 20, 2022

I’m going to be tired tomorrow. I know this. And yet here I am, writing. I am present in this moment, staring at my screen, pondering the events that will transpire tomorrow. I am alive. I am awake. I am feeling good and relaxed.

/I have a pain in my lower right abdomen. It’s been hurting for a while now. I’m currently on my period. I have been for about a week now. My flow has been consistently heavy. The pain is sharp and jagged. I feel like throwing up.

I’ve been ing doctors for some time now. I started seeing them in California. I doctor shopped. I found a decent one I liked. And stuck with her. I explained my pain to her and she listened. we were trying to figure out why I constantly felt like a swollen bruised tomato.

When I went to California, I was exhausted. I had melted down (as my mother likes to call it) a week before and was staying with my cousin Jon before I bought my ticket and left the state of Texas for the next two years.

////I can’t concentrate because of the pain I’m in. There is it again like a knife in my gut. I’ve been dealing with this for 2 years. It’s hot pain. It feels like my lower right abdomen is glowing a hot red. I feel faint when I think about it.

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