Oh boy! This has been (and continues to be) a difficult process for me. I feel big, I have so much joy and love in my heart. I do not regret an ounce of love I've given to someone in my past, present, or will in the future.
I love big. I feel big. I enjoy being this way!
But, my friends, one of the trickier parts of this feeling personality is to know when a feeling is fleeting or if the feeling is accurate. This, is often why I end up in a therapist's office during times of high feelings and low accuracy.
It is a time when I'm confused, because I feel big! I have big feelings and I believe in the power of the light ... I believe we're all of light and dark. I believe our light empowers us and can absolutely win every time, but I also believe some people's darkness has been leaning the scales that way for so long, that perhaps they aren't sure how to lean closer into the light and allow that to hold more weight.
I believe in souls and I believe that each of us has a soul inside that desires the light. It's just the ways of our world that give that darkness power to weigh scale of light vs dark down more sometimes.
The beauty of all of this concept of light vs dark, is that you can change. You can learn to test your feelings for accuracy, and you can learn to trust your true instincts again.
If you want to take the time ... to do it!
Embracing the full spectrum of my emotions has always been an intrinsic part of who I am. I feel things with an intensity that sometimes overwhelms me, yet it's this very ability to feel so deeply that I cherish the most. It's a double-edged sword – a source of both immense joy and profound vulnerability.
The Power of Big Feelings
Living with big feelings is like being attuned to the subtlest of frequencies – every nuance, every shift in emotion feels magnified. When I love, it's as if my whole being is poured into that love. It's all-encompassing, passionate, and sincere. I've often been told that I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I wouldn't have it any other way. This transparency in emotion makes my relationships rich and rewarding. It's a journey marked by an authenticity that I wouldn't trade for anything.
But with great depth of feeling comes a heightened risk of hurt. The pain I experience is as intense as the joy. The challenge, I've found, is not in the feeling itself but in managing the sheer scale of these emotions. Sometimes, they are like waves that threaten to sweep me away, and it's in these moments that I've learned the importance of anchoring myself.
Navigating the Emotional Landscape
Understanding the ebb and flow of my emotions has been a journey in itself. I've had to learn to differentiate between what is a fleeting feeling and what is an enduring truth. This is where therapy has been a beacon of light. It has provided me with the tools to navigate through the complexities of my emotional world. In therapy, I've learned to give my feelings space and respect, to listen to them without being overpowered by them. It's been a process of self-discovery, of peeling back layers to understand the core of my emotional responses.
The Dichotomy of Light and Dark
My belief in the duality of light and dark within each of us is a cornerstone of my understanding of human nature. We all have our shadows, parts of ourselves that we struggle with or are afraid to confront. But it's this very struggle that makes the moments of light so much more meaningful. I've come to realize that the darkness is not something to be feared or rejected but acknowledged and understood. It's a balance, a dance between two aspects of the self, each with its own lessons and insights.
Embracing both the light and dark within me has been empowering. It's taught me that no feeling is inherently bad or good. They are all part of the human experience, each with something to teach us. My own journey through periods of darkness has led me to a deeper appreciation of the light, of the moments of joy and love that fill my life.
The Evolution of the Soul
I believe that at the core of each of us is a soul yearning for the light. This belief has been a guiding force in my life. It's a reminder that no matter how overpowering the darkness may seem, there is always a path back to the light. It's not always easy, and often it's a path that we must walk alone, but it's a journey worth taking.
I've come to understand that change is not only possible but essential. Testing my feelings for accuracy, learning to distinguish between instinct and impulse, has been a crucial part of this journey. It's about learning to trust myself, to trust my inner voice that guides me towards my true path.
The Commitment to Self-Growth
Choosing to embark on this journey of self-discovery and emotional growth is a decision I make every day. It's a commitment to myself, to live authentically and wholeheartedly. It requires time, patience, and often, a leap of faith. But the rewards are immeasurable. With each step, I find myself more in tune with who I am, more grounded in my own truth.
The beauty of this process lies in its continual nature. There's always more to learn, more depths to explore. It's an ongoing dialogue between the heart and mind, a negotiation between the light and dark. It's a path of transformation, of becoming the fullest, most authentic version of myself.
As I continue on this journey, I am reminded of the incredible resilience and capacity for growth that lies within each of us. It's a journey that is uniquely ours, yet it connects us all in the shared experience of being human. And in this connection, in this shared journey towards the light, lies the true beauty of our existence.
Raise your hand if you're also a big feeling human, like you love big, feel big, and give LIFE your all ...
Love and light to you,
Brandy Ellen