If you are reading this piece, it probably means you have a personal smartphone/laptop, an internet connection and the luxury to ponder over such philosophical questions. You have better living standards than the majority. Can it be said life has been fair to you to some extent? Still, chances are pretty good that you have blamed life for being unfair to you at some point in time. Maybe you still do. As you continue to read this article, numerous people far and wide are busy figuring out from where their next meal would come? You are living someone's dream, yet you cry, "NOT FAIR!". How so? First of all, there is no such thing as 'objective fairness'. What's fair for you, might be unfair for someone else.
Say there is a fresh batch of students. It is just a few days into the course. Jack is sitting adjacent to Matt. Jack asks Matt's help with some topics, Matt agrees. After a few days, Matt finds himself in need of some assistance. Matt decides to ask Jack. Jack expresses his inability to help Matt as he has too many things on his plate - an additional certification course, guitar lessons after class and pending assignments. Matt is furious. He feels it was unfair of Jack to forsake him. Jack feels it was unfair of Matt to be angry at him because he has a genuine reason and there is no obligation to help as there is in a friendship. None of them is right or wrong. It is just the way few things are! Fairness is an interpretation that will always have gaps when viewed from a different perspective.
"But...but..but this is an ambiguous case, I can show you where people have been clearly unfair to me.."
Even if we keep aside the subjective nature of the topic, the idea of fairness seems self-centred in most people. By fairness, people think life should treat them nicely; their manager should be polite all the time, everyone should co-operate with them, and so on. Do you have any idea how absurd that sounds? The world doesn't revolve around you. Why should your manager be polite all the time? His priorities are different from yours. You are working for a salary. Maybe the manager is working to achieve company goals. Why should everyone you meet co-operate with you? They have a life and problem of their own to figure out. Does it feel unfair that the one you infatuate for isn't attracted towards you? Why should they be? What have you done to deserve it? Even if you have expressed why you deserve their affection, why should they accept your proposal? Maybe you are just one among the hundreds who are infatuating. It has nothing to do with your competence. It is not even about you. Again, the world doesn't revolve around you.
People who tend to think along these lines that life has always been unfair to them might be suffering from "The Fallacy of Fairness". It is one of the many cognitive distortions that tricks people into perceiving life as more bitter and hostile than it is. Anyone suffering from this fallacy assumes, "I know what is fair. If people don't follow my framework of fairness, then they are at fault". Society has always been governed by mutually agreed-upon rules. Today we call these rules law and order that helps us settle differences peacefully. A victim of "Fallacy of Fairness" ends up applying these legal contracts in personal life and blames everyone around for not being fair enough. Rarely two different people would agree on one definition of fairness and in this case, there is no judge/court to settle the dispute.