So, I'll preface this with I'm not an a typical human. I have ADHD and I'm probably on the autism spectrum but that's difficult to get anyone to diagnose in Greece.
Anyway, as usual I digress. Every endeavour will usually be defeated by the mind before the body. The body is an amazing machine, sometimes let down by the mind if it wanders to far off its path.
I've been in a fight with my mind for as long as I remember, combating the ADHD, dealing with insane bouts of depression, accepting I don't really understand consequences of my actions until after the event. Now I have an outlet that keeps my mind on track, cycling in many ways has saved me from myself.
And this is why I always want to push harder, go further, go faster. It levels me out, the challenge is less physical. All I have to do is keep turning the cranks and I keep moving forward. The challenge is not letting the doubts whispering in my mind become shouts and screams. On a bike I've mastered this, apart from that one time when my feet got super cold and I bailed.
The point is to learn what brings the doubts and fears and work through them, rationalise it all, and make a plan to get through it. I regularly have to tell my mind to go another 50km, then another. But I never let my mind win when I'm on a bike, I'll ride until my body says no more, not my head.
Yesterday, as I said in the previous post put me through the ringer, but I've now worked through the issues, I'm still not happy, but they are just obstacles that bother my mind more than my body. So we'll push through.
Its time to believe in yourself, and what you can do. It's what's landed me in Lyon doing a 1000km race.
Get Amongst It!