A few months ago I started my journey back to the classroom. Having spent the last 14 years as an elementary school principal, it was quite the transition. I was fortunate enough to have moved into a classroom where the former teacher left me an ample supply of materials and teaching supplies. Getting back to writing lesson plans took time. Grading papers! Can't forget that one. All the responsibilities of a classroom teacher came back to me. It was a challenge, but this time around, I wasn't a twenty-something teacher right out of college. I had 25+ years of experience and I used that experience to keep my composure leading up to the big first day as my 3rd graders raced into our classroom. So little. So full of excitement.
It wasn't until a few weeks into the school year that I started having these weird comparisons to one of my favorite TV shows of all time. It may be yours too. The Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul universe is a powerful one, with brilliant writing and even more brilliant acting. I'm willing to risk it and for those who have never seen the show, you can exit out of this post right now. For those who have seen it, you'll understand the metamorphosis of criminal defense attorney Saul Goodman to law evader Gene Takovic, who quietly manages a Cinnabon in Omaha, Nebraska after leading a wild life as a key cog in the drug empire of Walter White.
Saul Goodman lived his life full of excitement never knowing what his day would bring. A lot of people depended on him. Saul was a people person. Flashy suits and bravado made him stand out. In the office, out in the field, or maybe in the courtroom, his day was fast and furious. Again, the whole drug thing aside, the life of a school principal is very similar to Saul Goodman. You sometimes have to be a fast talker, work yourself out of jams, and encourage others to get their acts together.
A school principal is here there and everywhere. Yes, sometimes we have office work. Good principals are in the classrooms more. Looking back, I can confidently say that I checked that box. However, tell me how getting shot in the leg with an air pistol, getting tackled at a conference, running down the middle of a road chasing an angry child, and getting heckled on a Saturday morning out at breakfast with my family all happened to me as a school principal? Well, they did. You would think these experiences would be more aligned to the slick Saul Goodman.
Then one day it all stopped.
My crazy life was over. I drove to work, I swiped into my school building and walked into my empty classroom. I sat down and got ready for my day. It was as if I mixed and baked the dough, and spread the icing. Over and over. Day after day. The kids came and went. At the end of each day, I packed up and quietly walked out the same side door and got into my car. This was my life of Gene, not Saul.
No more after school phone calls that a child didn't get off the bus. No more parent e-mails upset by a low grade and feeling that the teacher didn't do anything about it. No more urgent meetings. No more conferences, no more administrative red tape, no more to-do lists of things that needed to be fixed yesterday. This was my former life of Saul, not Gene.
However here is where my comparison to Gene stops. Gene would go home and watch his old commercials of his Better Call Saul persona. As he watched them in his lonely world, the viewer could tell that he longed for his old life. It would only be a matter of time before Gene scratched his itch. For those who are in the universe, you know the rest and know how it all ended for Gene..uh, um, Saul.
While I will always look back on my fourteen year ride of being a school principal with pride, I know I will never do this job again. Was I perfect? Far from it. Did I make mistakes? Lots of them. But I do know I treated students, teachers, and families with respect and kindness. I treated the students how I would hope my own children were treated in their school. I still am in contact with many of the teachers I led. I think that says something.
While it has taken some adjustment, I like my new life in Omaha, where I quietly go about my work. I get to actually see the people who bite into their delicious food and see their smiles. I no longer have to run around the C Suite and figure out how we can lower costs without sacrificing quality. No more having to sit in HR meetings because two employees can't get along. And gone are my days of having to figure out how I can best follow corporate edicts and put on my happy face to assuage employees who are sick of taking one step forward and two steps back.
I now get to kneed the dough, lick the icing and say Thanks for coming, have a great day!
I'm still pinching myself for how much calmer my life is right now. If you need to find this calm in your life, I hope you can find a little bit of Gene and embrace it.