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“Be careful not to choke on your aspirat ...

“Be careful not to choke on your aspirations, director.” —Darth Vader

Aug 21, 2022

Hello everyone! I hope you have all had a good couple of weeks? First off, apologies for not writing a blog for a couple of weeks as a few people have asked me when the next one is coming. I am aiming to do an update via this platform at a maximum of once a week, but I will also not publish blogs for the sake of it, I would hate to be writing about things of no consequence. “Tuesday 15th August – Had Cereal, felt Crap, went to bed” It doesn’t read very well. I do also put a lot of thought and time into them too and spend a couple of days with an over arching theme in my head and then take notes and then compile something when I have what I deem to be enough, relevant content to publish. I am also worried each and every week that I come across like I’m moaning all the time which would be a disservice to you guys reading it and to me as I have lots of joy in my life, alongside my mental health issues. I speak about my mental health issues more often as they have the biggest impact on my everyday life, channel life and the relationships I maintain.

I want to acknowledge also why I have been using ‘Star Wars’ quotes as titles for my blogs too. Essentially it started off while I was watching ‘Kenobi’. I just thought “I know, I haven’t written a blog for a while. I’ll use ‘hello there’ and a nice big picture of Ewan McGregor’s beautiful face’ and it’ll work” Now it’s served its purpose brilliantly and it’s also inspired me to make each piece thematic. ‘Hello there’ was a refresh on me, my background and what I’m trying to achieve. “I hate you!” was an opportunity for me to vent my frustrations at the world and the people in it, to a degree. sometimes things can’t be said. You cannot just flatly tell people that you don’t agree with them or that your opinion is vastly different or sometimes you get so tangled up with stuff that you forget what your own core values and beliefs are and the nature of the written blog is that you can just work through this stuff in writing. I had some interesting comments back and many discussions as a result of ‘I hate you’ and promoting discussion, thought and relationship building is the point of this right? Itching that creative spot on your metaphorical back with a pair of cooking tongs. It also has such an awesome effect on my thought process. By writing the ‘I hate you’ piece. It literally stopped me from having an implosion and most likely, loosing people I care about, the process works for me and it’s also something I look back on and I am proud of. As I’ve said before I love playing with words, artworks and anything creative that keeps me in the moment, gets me thinking and also inspires change and positive thinking.

‘Took you long enough’ was written, trying to flip the anger and injustice I was feeling about the current state of the world into something positive, I am always mindful of my privilege and the benefits my family have being citizens of the UK but also trying to highlight the structured poverty that we live in too. By structured poverty I mean that I don’t have to walk 20 miles for clean water, but I do have to watch my children suffer as a result of our poverty, constant inadequacies about life all the time, dwindling living standards and people living in crisis levels of poverty in my local community. It’s a first world problem for damm sure but I try to stay humble by having gratitude for having these types of problems to moan about. I hope that makes sense at least. I also wanted ‘Took you long enough’ to try and poke fun at myself and lighten up the tone of this series of blogs and as always Star Wars provides.

So why then did I choose this title?? I hear no-one scream

“Be careful not to choke on your aspirations, director.” —Darth Vader

I’m Krennic, choking on the aspirations. I do all this in a public forum, then when it bites me or caused me to have to stop, take a breath and evaluate behaviours, other people’s behaviours, things I cannot control or should have any right to control I’ve slipped on my own Banana peel. I’ve done something for all the right reasons, and it’s had a negative consequence… Its that simple. The wider connotations of the setting of Star Wars, it being Darth Vader and that Director Krennic is an ambitious and devious little fuck gets people thinking, it gets me thinking. That is priceless to me. Of course, doing what I do in a public forum is going to have both positive and negative consequence just like in real life, positives and negatives. I would be very naive to think I could be like Krennic and have it all my own way all of the time. In this context Darth Vader is my aspirations and shutting me down, hitting me with a gut punch to make me humble again and that’s ok. That’s my process. So, no big conspiracy, just me knobbing about with words, sloppy metaphors and a jumbo thesaurus. Plus, I love Star Wars 😉

Probably should start including basic channel updates in these as well. I have a couple of plans on the horizon in regard to strengthening the social media side of my brand. I will be creating a discord server in the near future. I have run mutual support discord servers before and personally now I have no taste for micromanaging a community again, but now I am also encountering a much broader audience I have been asked by several people to make one. I thought about it a hell of a lot as it could potentially be another can that falls off the shelf and I’ll end up with worms everywhere. I don’t like worms especially canned worms.

The exciting side for me is setting up the roles, the channels. It will be a strict fan server with no self-promotion tabs at all. Literally a place to access me for merch, dates, schedules and get some perks as well from membership tiers. All Goblin themed of course. Get to design some stuff as well. Can have a separate place exclusively for ‘Goblin Racing’ and really get that expanded, I’m very proud of my racing teams in the two forms it currently takes. I really am excited to get an F1 league together as well, would be frigging awesome. I’m also having some thought with twitter. I’m thinking of giving up on Twitter and FB. I hate FB, like passionately. I think I would legit spit at Mark Zuckerberg if I saw him in the street. I used to use FB a lot for channel promotion back in the day but now my content is being regularly viewed via browse features, suggested videos and searched for I don’t feel the need for the same level of promotion. This is exactly what’s happening with Twitter as well, people will re-tweet my stuff but in terms of link clicks it’s so negligible, so I ask myself what’s the point?

I am also going to attempting to get a shorts schedule up and running again. When I made shorts, I really enjoyed what I made, little niche moments of comedy that really express my comedy but as always, my routine changed, and I stopped prioritizing them. So, I may be doing that in the future. If I do though I will make a whole bunch before scheduling them all so prepare for like 6 months of shorts releasing one a week, might be a good way to re-visit classic funny moments from previous streams too. Imagine an Assassins Creed Odyssey short popping up in six months’ time, could be fun. Finally, I am very much enjoying Ghosts of Tsushima currently. It’s not perfect by any means but I am loving the setting and the sword combat is excellent even if I’m not overly happy with the climbing mechanics at all (quite buggy and not smooth) but it’s a top, top game. I’ll be returning to the F1 daytime streams once the kids are back at school and I find an hour during the day free. I’m keen to get my Career mode back underway now I am with McLaren and have the chance at regular podiums, will be fun fighting for a championship for sure. Will also be back behind the wheel of a Goblin Racing car in the My Team Mode as well. I really need a published schedule …. too chaotic for that.

Want to say a massive thank you to the members of the horde. Without you guys the channel literally wouldn’t be happening right now in this climate. It keeps me going too and I couldn’t be more grateful. To my audience in general, thank you for being so awesome, understanding and supportive of me. Touches the heart.

Have a fantastic day and if it isn’t, you can always try again tomorrow.

Much Love

Goblin in Chief


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