“You are what?” Kartik gets up from the sofa and drops his chips packet.
“Yeah! I’m gonna be a dad soon. And you’re gonna be an uncle.” Daksh replies joyfully on the other side of the phone call.
“Dude it’s just been a year to your engagement!” Kartik changes the phone to his right ear.
“And what do you think was gonna happen after that? We’re going to be married in a month and by the year’s end I’m gonna be a father.”
“I refuse to consider you a ‘Father’! You’re a kid yourself!” Kartik complains louder.
“Haha,” Daksh laughs on the phone. “Guess I gotta work on that.”
“You’re just 27!”
“Just? Oh well. The way I see it I’m hitting 30 in 3 years.”
Kartik sighs loudly. “I can’t wrap my head around this.”
“You have to. Natasha insists on your presence at the baby shower. Don’t forget! 8th September. See you there.”
The call ends and Kartik sits on the sofa slowly with his jaw dropped.
For the next 5 minutes, he keeps thinking about the call and the upcoming situation. The guy who pees from a bridge in the river with him while singing “yeh dosti hum nahi todenge” when drunk is going to be a father within months. Why had he not considered Daksh extending his family when he announced his engagement to Natasha? What did he think engagements were about?
Kartik scratches his head and lets out an exasperated breath. He turns on the TV again to distract himself.
Kartik keeps switching the channels furiously. Nothing seems to excite him anymore. At last, he types in the channel number for Cartoon Network and leans back in his seat with a smile watching Tom and Jerry.
After 10 minutes his younger brother Sameer sits beside him on the sofa. He takes the remote and switches to a news channel.
“The hell?” Kartik complains.
“THE WAR BETWEEN IRAN AND ISRAEL IS TAKING SHAPE!” The news anchor shouts and starts his reporting.
Kartik snatches the remote from Sameer.
“Hey, I wanna know about the war!” Sameer complains.
Kartik switches back to Cartoon Network.
“Yeah, your Tom and Jerry is more interesting. Freakin grow up! You’re 27!”
Sameer 's sentence hits a nerve in Kartik. The brothers keep fighting for the remote but Sameer eventually wins and the news anchor is back on screen. Sameer leans forward to listen carefully. Kartik watches him ridiculously. 1 minute of it and he leaves for his room.
On his way, he passes by his mother who is smiling and looking at her phone.
“What happened?” He asks.
His mother looks up smiling and shows him the screen. “Jia’s 10th results are here! She scored 93%!”
Kartik goes expressionless for 2 minutes. Seeing him turn white, his mother stops smiling as well. “What happened?”
“Jia?”
“….Y….Yes?”
“You mean the Jia playing in my lap just some time ago? You mean she has given her board exams just now?” Kartik shows her small height from his palm.
“Ever heard of growing up?” His mother smiles and walks away.
Kartik keeps standing in the hallway for a long time with his hand in the air and a confused face. A serious thought dawns on him and he frowns.
He very slowly drags his feet back to his room. Wishing to be mindless for the time being, he drops himself on his bed and starts scrolling through his social media.
TODAY IS THE 5TH ANNIVERSARY OF JOKER (2019)
Kartik sits up quickly after reading that post.
But it feels like just yesterday I was watching it with my friends in the theatre!
Kartik throws his phone on the bed and holds his head.
Am I……… old?
He looks around and decides to take a walk. On exiting his room, he finds his father standing in front with folded hands.
Kartik stops in his tracks.
“We need to talk….. son.”
Kartik cannot maintain eye contact. “About?”
His father turns back. “Follow me.”
Kartik follows his stern father into his study. His father locks the door behind him and makes Kartik sit.
His father sits in front and keeps a finger to his chin looking at him. Kartik gulps.
“It is time.”
“……..Time?”
“For you to take the next step.”
“?????? Death? Hahahaha.” Kartik laughs aloud.
His father maintains his firm posture, forcing Kartik to retract his laugh.
“You need to marry.” He says.
Kartik slowly looks up at him with shock.
“It’s time.”
“What time Dad? Are you drunk? What kinda nonsense are you talking about all of a sudden? Marriage? Look at me. I’m a kid!”
“Exactly why you need to marry. You are refusing to grow up and only a marriage can fix that. I have talked with your mother and looked into 5–6 families and…”
“What?” Kartik stands up. “What did you do?”
His father stands up as well. “Grow up Kartik! You’re going to be 28 next month!”
Kartik’s anger dissipates and he searches the study for a calendar. The calendar tells him it is precisely 21 days to his birthday.
“One of the families will be here on Monday and we..”
Kartik furiously walks out and slams the door behind him.
“Listen to me! They will be here on Monday, you have to dress properly and talk to the girl for some hours and let us know what you….”
But everything is falling on deaf ears. Kartik walks out of the house and turns the keys on his bike. He needs time to actually process his age.
