Dear friend,
Hello 🍂
I remember dates but lately, I’ve been losing track of the days. Today felt like a Friday... NGL, still does.
Today is the 29th of September, and there was a time in 2020 when I was tuned in to the number 29. The energy, its vibe. Something about them being Eleventh Hour Portals, if you will. They mark an end but not quite. Do you know what I mean?
There is a thing drawing to a close, and it is something that I understand has completed its scheduled time under the Sun. I set the time, and yet I wish for it to continue in some capacity, for it to transition into something new so that it may be carried through. I’m not making much sense, am I? You don’t know me from Eve. This is a public journal, and I write about very personal things.
Things I think about...
We rarely take the time to ground ourselves through an impending or looming ending. As a people, I believe we are conditioned and programmed to fear impermanence on many levels, in different ways. Beginnings are looked to, like an Angel of Destiny, and endings are regarded with distrust and a formidable eye. ‘What are you gonna bring to the table?’
I get that.
Beginnings are special, especially for those seeking to tap into renewed hope. Rewrite stories. Enter a Sacred Land. ‘Doors closing’ come imbibed with Life-changing magick too. Hear me out. I mean, we know this on some level, but rarely do we lean into it as much as we do - a beginning. I speak more for the ‘Nuance’ perspective of it all. The scale-stand upholding two well-rounded Cups.
I speak for endings because as much as they were befuddling, bereaving in the moments shit went down (I feel like being crude here), there were cataclysmic in the change they brought about, that they seemingly forced me into ... in the newness the Divine wished to flood into my strides. High time, high time. I know it is not easy when you do not foresee an ending coming, when you are the one feeling called to strike the match, bring fire to a Tower robbing you of your light and life. It is hard. Context is important. History too.
When I speak of grounding through a close, I mean: taking your time with things, as you process and unpack, as you set adrift and set down.
Self-care is important; these are your shells 🐚, your support systems 🕸.
Self-care is akin to our Second House in the manner (manor?) that it helps hold us, root us down, even when Times come in for the Kill. We lean on that support, that soul-sustenance in times of peril. It is so because yeah, we take the ‘beating’ (even if we may not necessarily desire it) but we perish not in the fall-out. Things fall apart (Chinua Achebe!!!!), and we are one with the times.
A memo: You are wonderful, you are kind, you are supremely divine! 🤙🏽
Edit edition: I should’ve done a Tower card!!!! 😓 Oh well, something to add to my To-do list.
Don’t under-shell yourself,
Roanna