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A Morning Affair With Love, My Midlife C ...

A Morning Affair With Love, My Midlife Chrysalis  

Dec 03, 2022

Dear Reader,

If you’re reading this you’re either still here after so long or you’re a new reader. In either case thank you for sharing the precious commodity of time and maybe a dash of curiosity, with me, one of the many writers whose work you could be enjoying right now. 

The question I wanted to answer was what I have been up to, but that is a long post perhaps better broken up into several. One of the things that I wanted to learn to do better in my writing is to understand my reader so that our dialogues or my monologues will be helpful and inspiring. With that in mind I decided to take some classes to improve my writing in a memoir-style as well as content strategy, which are both very much about the reader as well as the writer. Thank you for going on this journey with me! 

I want to introduce a piece of writing to you that has at its heart a healing self-care practice. One of the best kinds of love we can have is for ourselves. Developing a strong relationship with my own heart is the work that only I can do for myself, and then I say the more the merrier; when my foundation is strong, others can join in if they like, and generally that authentic love is attractive, sometimes in a contagious or infectious way. Imagine good contagion or infectious joy!  

But how do we like or love ourselves? I say, any way you like! I like to make use of the daily routines to be present with myself. That’s what the writing I’m about to share is about. 

So I received an interesting opportunity via my class on writing memoirs to do some homework that explained something I do at least several times a week that has at least ten steps and write it up as a (Diary of Me) story. It was a great writing exercise. I sent it around to several good friends and received encouraging feedback, so I decided to share it below with you, my dear reader. 

I hope you enjoy the writing, get to know me as your writer a little better, and feel more joy in your heart through something I shared. Let me know in the comments your thoughts and questions. 

Thank You, 

Miko 

Project Title: A Morning Affair With Love, The Miko Diaries  

I call it one of my midlife chrysalis routines to set me up for soaring success while I recover from illness, injury, and my first marriage. I don’t really feel like a caterpillar or butterfly but “midlife chrysalis” is a lot better sounding than midlife crisis. 

Sometimes I think I could write about how to stay balanced when your life turns right side up by using micro routines. As a new divorcee, I am learning about that all over again. “This is the way of the divorcee!” I say and smile at my rhyme. 

Every morning some things happen no matter what, a few of those mornings lend themselves to more energy expenditure, the other mornings I am in a slow flow. Every week a collection of activities help me feel nurtured. 

It all begins with the first flickers of consciousness. Before my eyes open. I feel my body against my bed, the bamboo sheets, my limbs pressed gently by the weight of the pillows on top of my covers. I am stylish as well as comfortable in my silky pajamas. Slowly I begin to stretch, covering the bed, becoming as big as I can, like a human starfish. 

Under the covers, I consider the effort it will take to reach for my medication. Thyroid medication a must at least half an hour before breakfast. I visualize where I left a glass of water for myself the night before. It could be anywhere in the room with a stable enough surface. (Sometimes I go to bed long after I’m tired, but I don’t even realize I’m tired. I blame my medications because someone has to get the blame.) 

I find my glass of water, open my pink medicine holder and prepare to do some swallowing. First the thyroid medication, I can check that box. I take the other morning medication too, the one to calm me down (before I even fully wake up!), the one to help me focus, the one for breast cancer, and once a week the one for 50,000 IU of Vitamin D2. Those are just the pharmaceuticals. Then I get up and walk to get the supplements. This is a trick to get me moving. 

I swallow 2 huge fish oil capsules (thank you fish for your gift of nutrients) and that’s for the omega 3’s (these ones have the mercury filtered out too). I also take two blends called Restore and one with Vitamin D3 and K2, one of each - the first one to help my body continue to repair after and before surgery which I’m having again in a few weeks. Vitamin D3 is to continue to help my vitamin D levels which have been low since chemo. 

Stretch, stretch and stretch some more from head and fingers to toes. After the medicating I stretch in bed and roll around, feeling the softness of the sheets. I just let my body do whatever it wants as it finds its rhythm for the day. Sometimes it’s a yoga pose. Sometimes I thank myself for the stretching I do at night too. All these things for a good night’s sleep and a good rhythm for the day. 

The rhythm of the day includes a few minutes of bouncing on my mini trampoline, maybe to some happy music played by Google Home. Then as I walk into my closet I hang on the pull-up bar. If I’m energetic enough after warming up I will do a round or two of calisthenics, a full-body mini-workout. 

Mmmm yes, I then will inhale spirit via the marijuana goddess plant. I committed to being under her inspiration for the entirety of my cancer treatment, and who knew what would come after that. My potentially last surgery for reconstruction is in a few weeks. I love to puff the magic dragon. I love the fire, the smoke, the glass, the herb, and the liberty to use natural medicine. Sometimes I am not in the mood for her, but I’m grateful for her because she helps balance the medication’s side effects. Sometimes she is delicious with coffee. 

Ahhh coffee. I mostly like it dark with cream. Recently I had a fancy coffee that was mild and it was so delicious, like coffee with butter whipped into goodness, I almost questioned my dark strong coffee choices. However, usually in the morning I so love my dark coffee, strong like my will, and tempered by a creamer of some kind--these days that’s an oat and almond milk blend. 

Coffee almost invariably goes with breakfast in the morning. I love my overnight oats with raspberries and blueberries. Does anything else taste that good consistently? Of course, there are so many things that taste as good or better, but it’s such an accessible deliciousness that I enjoy daily for months at a time. Coffee takes some time to drink, so I go about the rest of my morning with a cup of it beside me. 

There have been times in my life when making my bed was a liberty I chose not to indulge in. But since being sick with cancer and the aftermath of all of that, my bed-making became one of my few simple accomplishments of the day. I was happy that I could get out of bed and make it pretty. 

Choose to clothe. Usually, I have been doing all of that preparation for the day in my jammies and robe. What do I feel like wearing? What colors? Pants or some kind of dress? I choose my panties and bra too for the mood of the day. Urban goddess or understated chic? Every day it could be something different. 

Remove pajamas. Well, I have to remove my pajamas to put my clothes on; in between those two activities, I will shower. 

I love the warm water sliding down my body. The surfer girl shampoo, the soapy suds, the washcloth across my upper and lower body, paying special attention to the legs and feet. I take several deep breaths while the water is warm before I turn the temperature cool to coldish. 

I used to take freezing cold showers when I was training in my thirties, to help me with anxiety. I’m gentler now with myself. Some might call it more indulgent. These days I would joke that it’s the new way of this divorcee. 

Happy Birthday June 2021 Selfie

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