Deck: Messy Truth
I realized with my 2 oracle decks, they're the shadow and light work for each other. They work together for me. My Angel Deck Self Reading.
All together of the Past:
GASLIGHTED
Manipulation • Doubting Yourself • Twisted Truth
I dealt with a lot of this, it was to the point of having this directed towards myself, as well. Twisted around about who was doing this. A lot of my truths were also twisted around to benefit them and what they thought was true. Example, I shared something about my upbringing, and said I'm not a part of it. I was able to keep myself out of it. What was twisted around was that I was lying about keeping myself out it, and been told that I am a part of it. Despite the truth was actually what I said.
LOVE ME / LEAVE ME
Back-and-Forth Feelings • Unstable Affection
This was the reason why it was very difficult and complicated to get away. Constantly back-and-forth. Whenever I was ready to just leave, instantly just an innocant "I'm back". Living within the radius of an unstable person is actually scary and hard to get away from them. Lesson learnt, the hard way 🫠🤣😭😂
Anyway, this also really affected me, due to the Gaslight card, too. "I want to be the one chased for once.", and turns out, an unhealthy chasing was the expectation and just messed me up.
ŞTĂŁKÌÑĢ THEIR SOCIALS
Watching • Lurking • Secretly Obsessed
This was back and forth, too. The 2 cards mentioned above. Mostly my socials having lurking. Now that I'm years out of this past relationship, I havs been able to block and go completely no contact. With the imagery, I did sense the past energy of my socials having this cards meanings/insights. It was insane that they didn't like it that my life and myself looked better than when he stayed. He hated seeing that 🤣 Anyway, I'm too far for him to try and come back, in-person. Nah, that was a waste of 7 years to get rid of him without moving.
Bottom of the Deck Energy:
REAL EYES, REAL LIES
Seeing Clearly • Illusion Cracked • Awareness
I do see this. I am seeing things a bit more better. Slowly, but surely healing. I have been connecting the dots, seeing things that I missed back when it happened.
Once I finally heal a bit more better, the awareness and better understanding, the severely difficult lesson to learn, would help with more awareness with it possibly happening again. Outside of that, the physical realm and my sense of self would most likely come back in balance again.
Deck: Messy Truth