Photo from Wikipedia
I read an article about Lori and George Schappell, two conjoined twins who passed away last week at the age of 62. There is something fascinating about conjoined twins. Not too long ago, such people would be an act in a freak show. Today, we either try to separate them at birth or, if that is not an option, we do our best to make sure they live a good life. Sounds like Lori and George did.
There is so much we can learn from such people. The fact they are family is one bond to begin with. The Schappells were born female. George later decided he was transgender and so that decision was another one that had to be discussed and acted upon by the two. The two managed to hold down different jobs and George was even a country singer, booking gigs overseas.
Abby and Brittany Hensel are two women who are conjoined. The big news was that one of them married. Of course, this sparked some curiosity among people wondering what and how that marriage, sex and progeny would work. The Hensel women are fairly open about themselves and their relationships. They both teach 5th grade in Minnesota and in many ways represent how much people may need to get over the fact that conjoined twins sometimes do stay conjoined. And that most are well adjusted and perhaps better adjusted than the rest of us.
Chang and Eng Bunker were the conjoined twins from which the term “Siamese Twins” originated. They were born in 1811 and died in 1874, aged 62, (which is coincidental with the death of the Schappell twins) and had two wives, two families, and were entertainers on what we would today call the talk-show circuit.
Understanding that “we are in this together” takes on a certain meaning when looked through the eyes of conjoined twins. Physical reality forces them to compromise, be creative, discreet and supportive. I am sure that the twins accept that “My actions can either help or hurt you, and my actions toward you will either help or hurt me, too”.
We all are one way or another conjoined. Everything from communication practices, to money, to countries, to religion have at least an element of coming together. People who are joined either in a successful marriage or a business partnership perhaps learn how to act like they are conjoined. As much as our society likes to praise the individual, it has been the communal that has helped humanity manage to stay human.
As the world continues to get smaller, perhaps it is inevitable that our common bonds will become even more significant in order to survive. As hard as society wants us to exclaim our individuality, we know all too well the consequences when one decides that one is above anyone else. Such actions always result in damage to our “conjoined” status. We risk ultimately the destruction of everything in the process should that balance be disturbed.
It doesn't mean we can’t be individuals. We should be as long as we think in terms of what gifts we can bring to the whole.
For such conjoined twins, like George and Lori, they knew that their lives depended upon their individuality taking a backseat for the good of the whole. However, they, like all the conjoined twins, were very much their own person. We, who think we walk alone, should study their example.
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