With the Christian season of Lent about to become Easter, the Jewish celebration of Passover starting and the Muslim holy month of Ramadan underway and income taxes coming due (I threw that in as some folks consider money a religion nowadays) there is a sort of penitent mood that takes over the world. It is one of atonement for sins committed, but more importantly the belief in forgiveness.
That forgiveness exists is a challenge to most people. It is hard to "let go", which is what the word forgiveness means.
It seems to me there are two types of forgiveness in the world. The first kind is one in which the perpetrator acknowledges wrongdoing to the aggrieved, makes amends and then in turn receives forgiveness. The second is the perpetrator doesn’t acknowledge, doesn’t make amends and still receives forgiveness. They are very different in scope and not with the same outcome necessarily on their own. But they both need each other in order to make a better world.
The first kind is what I call “conditional forgiveness.” It exists in most legal systems in which conditions are set in order to keep the gears of society meshed and moving. A person who commits a crime is tried and if found guilty has the opportunity to express remorse for that crime and then, the judgment or atonement is dispensed. Society then gives the said criminal the chance to be able to return to society. That is considered forgiveness for the crime. In other words, Society is also the aggrieved victim of the crime and does the "letting go" on behalf of the people as a whole.
Flawed? Yes.
But in principle very ingenious in that there is a process to bring about a change to benefit society. This is what is meant by scholars when they write about forgiveness doesn’t mean to forget. Society has to remember and in turn, use forgiveness as an opportunity for change in order to avoid repeating conditions that brought about the crime in the first place. That is the final part of conditional forgiveness that is the most necessary. It is why we establish laws, have people in power to help enact those laws.
The second kind of forgiveness is of a spiritual nature. And that is the idea that regardless of what happens to the victims of a crime, the idea of forgiveness not only breaks the primal urge for retribution, but it also makes the idea of “conditional forgiveness” secondary in importance to whatever outcome happens.
I am always amazed at the families of victims of gun violence who forgive the person who committed that violence. By forgiving them, they release themselves from being controlled by the perpetrator. And here’s where belief has to come into play. Those people who forgive in such a way are people of great faith. Their faith is based on love. And that love, though painful, is practiced through forgiveness.
One must argue that both forms of forgiveness need to exist with the other in order not only for Society to thrive, but in order for the overall Moral Health of Society to be strong enough to have it thrive.
And here’s where it gets a bit rickety these days.
The ability to practice spiritual forgiveness is challenged when conditional forgiveness does not bring about change. If a bridge collapses from faulty construction, and those who built it are found guilty of such neglect, the atonement is that of not only punishing the guilty, but making sure bridges never collapse under such conditions again.
This is how Society maintains Moral Health.
In most sensational scenarios in which wrongs are committed (gun violence, the issue of abortion, climate change, political corruption) what is missing is the final element of conditional forgiveness: what is the collective resolve going forward?
And there’s the conundrum.
Most times, if not all times, spiritual forgiveness enables anyone who is aggrieved to come to the table and practice the art of communication and compromise--the two indicators of Societal Moral Health. That spirituality has to come from a place outside of Society: a belief in a higher power based on love. As corny as that sounds, it is the necessary element in order to maintain conditional forgiveness. And, as I said, once that evaporates, what is left is a broken system because the Societal need for change (what is the collective resolve going forward?) has been removed. The machine breaks down.
Forgiveness is complicated in that it has to be one part practical and one part spiritual. It has to be practiced with the understanding that somehow, change must occur in order to restore and maintain the Moral Health of Society. To forgive is to pledge to make “the world” better in spite of the pain that brings about that pledge and the pain of enacting the collective resolve. That is what is meant by letting go, but not forgetting.
To be forgiven is to be given the opportunity to be able to forgive anew. If Society is not able to practice forgiveness in totality, i.e., rehabilitating criminals to become members with all rights and privileges Society bestows, then Society will also break down. It is a delicate balancing act of holding on to letting go.
Conditional Forgiveness and Spiritual Forgiveness ultimately call for a belief in the power of Brotherly Love. And finding that belief is why Easter, Passover, Ramadan and yes, even filing taxes are important.
If you like this post, read Martin's other blog of the week here.