When I was a child, I looked up to the sky and I asked, “Sky, you’re so big and vast, how I can find a place for me to belong?” I thought the sky would answer me, but the sky remained silent. I turned to the earth and I asked, “Earth, you’re so wide and never ending, how can I find the path made for me?” I thought the earth would answer me, but the earth remained silent. I collected my questions hoping that one day someone would be to give me an answer.
When I was an adolescent, I looked up to the sky and I asked, “Sky, do you not see my endurance and suffering?” I thought the sky would answer me, but the sky remained silent. I turned to look at the earth and I asked, “Earth, do you see that no matter how fast I run, I can’t catch up to anyone?” I thought the earth would answer me, but the earth remained silent. I came back to sit and drowned in my tears that perhaps I was meant to suffer.
When I became an adult, I looked up to the sky and I asked, “Sky, why did you bring someone to me only to give me pain? Will I ever know happiness again?” I thought the sky would answer me but the sky remained silent. I turned to look at the earth and I asked, “Earth, why didn’t you leave a single footprint for me to follow so I could escape?” I thought the earth would answer me, but it remained silent. I came back to sit and cried silently.
Sky, Earth, I have prayed to you both for years. Every day I cried to see if you could see my pain. Every night I pleaded if you could hear my cries. But it’s like you’re deaf and blind. I’ve cried, I’ve been broken, I’ve envied others, I’ve been jealous of everyone…for a long time. I thought to myself…when will it be me? But one night, I went to bed and the sky answered me. The sky said this…
The one who has been blind to your struggles isn’t me. The one hasn’t seen your tries isn’t me. I am the sky…I have heard…I have seen…I have carried your pain to this day. But the person you chose isn’t the one I sent down. The person I sent down is the one in the mirror. The one I sent down is the one whose voice you silence. The one I sent down is the one you keep hidden. How many years have you veiled your goodness because others didn’t believe it was good enough? How many years have you buried your voice because others didn’t want to listen? When others raise their hand, your voice stops. When others raise their hands, your strength dissolves. You didn’t choose yourself. You let others choose your path. When they said your voice is too loud, you chose silence to hide your words. When they said you spoke too much, you collected your words and endured. They pushed you into a corner forcing you to bleed from your own heart. Your own hands sewed your lips closed.
But today, I as the sky, dedicate these words to you. Choose the one in the mirror, the one you wake up to see, to look upon, to be angry with, to hate, to yell at, to hide. The one in the mirror knows your heart, the wounds that are both big and small, what you hide, what you show. The one in the mirror has been reaching out to you asking, please don’t let me go. Why are you not holding on to get passed this threshold? Because the one in the mirror believes in you in every way. She knows your sadness, she knows your desires, she knows your wounds, she knows when you cry, she knows when you have no way out.
When you were a child, you looked up to the sky and you asked, “Sky, you’re so big and vast, how I can find a place for me to belong?” When you look into the mirror, you are staring at the person who will find that path for you. When you were an adolescent, you looked up to the sky and you asked, “Sky, do you not see my endurance and suffering?” When you look in the mirror, you will see that the person who will carry your burdens with you and never let you fall is staring at you. When you became an adult, you looked up to the sky and you asked, “Sky, why did you bring someone to me only to give me pain? Will I ever know happiness again?” When you look in the mirror, the person who loves you the most is staring back at you.
When you were a child, you asked the earth, “Earth, you’re so wide and never ending, how can I find the path made for me?” When you look in the mirror, you will find the person who is going to lead you is watching over you. When you were an adolescent, you asked the earth, “Earth, do you see that no matter how fast I run, I can’t catch up to anyone?” When you look in the mirror, the person you never chased is asking you to open your eyes. When you were an adult, you asked the earth, “Earth, why didn’t you leave a single footprint for me to follow so I could escape?” When you look in the mirror, the one leaving footprints for you has been asking you to accept her.
Today, I dedicate all the loving words to the one in the mirror, the words to uplift, empower, worth…the one in the mirror is my strength, my guiding light, my golden opportunity. With my hands, I shall pull her and me to be equal together, never letting one fall behind, never leaving one to suffer, never leaving one to endure alone. Today, I chose the one in the mirror.
Today, I stand to recognize and accept the one I see every day and night, the one I forgot to chase when time was too fast, the one I forgot to love when others silenced her voice. I will listen to her cry, her plea, guide her soul spirit, heart, body and mind to be of one, no longer letting her suffer. Today, I chose the one in the mirror.
Today, I rise to understand the silence when no words can be spoken and heard. I will embrace in my arms the shadow that walks with me as one, the one who leaves a footprint with me, the one who knows and carries my desires and pain in this universe. Today, I chose the one in the mirror.
Poetr