People tend to ask, “How did you know it was time to move on?” This is in regards to moving on from someone who hasn’t brought any good changes to your life. You know what I mean, toxic people, who bring to you gossip from the outside world and leave you feeling depleted. Many times, these are people we know, family members, who can’t wait to share with you the latest gossip about “you know who,” and hope that you will join in the on the conversation. But did you ever stop to think? If they have no problem talking about other people to you, they will have no problem talking about you to others. This is something we often learn the hard way. We feel that because they are family members, we will give them the benefit of the doubt and just speak about these things with them. Until word gets back to us about something we didn’t do started by the one person who has everything to say about anyone.
You can’t control what people are going to do or say. You can only control yourself and gain power over your own emotions. The best thing is to remind yourself what your purpose in listening to these conversations are all about. If you can’t find one, then it’s best to move on. They don’t help you become better people and for sure they do not help you grow. The only thing they do is drain your energy and make you feel guilty about why you did listen.
Setting boundaries to you and those who speak badly of others is a necessity that will help bring healing and peace to you. For sure, the moment you decide to do this, those who feel your absence is going to go against you in the worse way. They even start using you as a conversation starter but this only proves that setting that fine line between you and them was a definite must. We can’t delete the family part but we can put a distance far enough so that nothing will hurt us again. We learn to love from afar and keep our hearts safe. The greatest thing in life is growth and sometimes it may mean setting distance with those who keep a lease on you so you can’t be better.