2024…a whole new year to write your story and live it well. You know, last year, I spent it travelling with my family and experiencing new wonders in the world. It was the most I’d done regards in travelling and I loved every single moment of it. When I was younger, if you had asked me what I thought I’d be doing in my 40’s, I would have told you…gardening. Because I was raised by parents who gardened well into their late years of their life. And because at the age I was growing up, 40’s was made to look like it was old. I was afraid of growing old. Most of all, I was afraid of who would be absent by the time I reached my 40’s.
Well, now that I’m here, I have lost both sets of parents, mine and my husband’s, and the world as we know it has changed completely. It really is just me, him and our kids against the world now. Everything up until now was once a story written by someone who raised us to be kind, courageous and to live well. But when the world decided it was time to take them back, the pen was given to me to continue my story. Their blood ran deep in my veins and if I spoke, it would still echo a part of them. From here on out, it will be speaking about them in past tense.
As I begin the new year, I am going to be holding myself accountable for a lot of new changes in my life. First and foremost, containing my energy well and not spreading myself too thin. I have decided to take the year off from spiritual readings and to keep the world around me in a standstill for a bit. I look at my children growing up quickly and sometimes I wonder how I could have blinked for so long that they’re already taller than me. The mom guilt has been playing a hard card on me and I know you and I both feel this way too much of every day. But as a mother, we always wish for the best for our children, even if it means we have to give up a part of ourselves for the time being.
Recently, a brother and sister-in-law visited us, and we talked about how it was just maybe 4 years ago that my husband and I got to really travel by ourselves because our children were finally old enough to be left with the eldest. Before that, it was always family vacations, and although those are great, sometimes, as an adult and a woman, we yearn to be seen in our husband’s eyes still. Do take time for each other as well as family. It’s just as important and just as needed.
I am sending you good hopes for this year. May you receive all the best.