A quiet girl's problem with forced interaction

It’s one dark gloomy night in the middle of November. Summer has finally given up putting up the good fight as her last bit of warmth no longer lingers. With the sun setting in the late afternoon, the sky is already pitch black which somehow strangely compliments the crisp cold air biting at my cheeks.

Me, my siblings, and parents all depart the minivan, our hands occupied with covered dishes, pies, and cakes. As we enter into the unfamiliar home each of us kids are greeted by unfamiliar faces. Adults we’ve never seen until that moment. We each give a polite wave and smile, but suddenly we are barked at and forced to give a hug and a kiss on the cheek to these... strangers. These nice people insist that a smile and a wave just fine until they are told to forgive our lack of manners.

With every family outing that involved visiting other relatives, the scenarios have all been the same— forced greetings and forced goodbyes with physical contact. As these scenarios left 13-year-old me feeling awkward and ticked off rather than happy to see family the rest of the outing, I made it a precedence to always greet family members the way I’m told with or without being in the presence of parents, like that of a dog being trained by its owner.

With my shy nature and introverted personality, everyone now wonders why I'm the family member who never shows up.

As I was thinking that this was just the way of Haitian culture, I was dumbfounded to see similarities in the American classroom. With the class setting being a bit more low-key in their own version of forced interaction.

Working in groups

Introducing ourselves around the room

Partnering up with someone by teachers orders

Etc....etc.…

Again what the does this teach people? What does it teach children? It certainly doesn’t teach respect!

And what exactly did this remedy in my case?

Because now being a grown adult with college being 13 years in the past, I now hate unnecessary human interaction more than ever.

Small talk? No thanks.

Convo stoppers? Yes please!

How about we denormalize forced interaction especially on children?