[T/N] I apologize for grammar mistakes and incoherencies
Chapter 8: Love Is Imagination, The Sea Is Beautiful With Crystal-Clear Water
The weather was clear with a gentle breeze.
Small waves lapped against the shore, creating white foam.
Everything was perfect for someone on a beach vacation.
Yes, Tongrak was here for a beach vacation, so one would assume he should be in a good mood.
Thump!
“Why is he coming too?”
While the weather was clear, perfect for sailing, the large young man in just shorts and a dark tank top, showing off his strong arms, was pulling in the anchor that was hooked to the beach, but a soft white hand grabbed his arm, followed by a sour expression and an irritated tone that forced him to meet her gaze.
The beautiful man was already in a bad mood.
“Want to go diving?”
Yesterday, when he had suggested it, Khun Tongrak had tried to suppress a smile, pretending not to want to go, even though his eyes were sparkling, and Mahasamut teased a bit, saying, “You're at the sea but want to stay cooped up in the room?” He complained about the heat, and after a few more words about diving, the person easily agreed.
And...he woke up early without needing to be woken.
Usually, he had to go and wake him in his room, but today, the beautiful man came out to have breakfast without any prompting, and his handsome face, wearing famous brand sunglasses, drinking coffee by the beach, was quite the sight.
Even if it wasn't Mut, anyone could see he was excited, but...
Even when he's pouting, he's still cute.
Mahasamut laughed to himself, looking at the handsome face that had soured, his eyes hardened, his neck returned to its usual defiant position, with a soft hand still clutching his arm, but the way he glanced at someone else who had already climbed onto the boat made the big man struggle to keep from laughing.
“Good morning, handsome Phii, today I want to tag along, okay, Phii?”
The cause of this might be this kid.
The young man who had climbed onto the boat to help with the anchor was now waving his hand, showing all his teeth with a wide smile to his 'handsome brother'. The person who was bumped into looked even more displeased, glaring at him with an irritated look.
Looks like he's still embarrassed about the island's “best product.”
The big man smiled subtly, then took the hand that was gripping his arm, soothingly stroking it.
“When we go diving, I need an assistant. Otherwise, who will watch the boat when I'm in the water with the guests?” He explained calmly, watching as his eyes softened, but not without a quiet mumble.
“Why does it have to be this kid?”
“Actually, Palm works with me, but he likes to take bar jobs at night. Normally during the high season, he's always with me.” Not including several others who go off to different jobs during the low season and come back to work with him during the tourist season.
The listener began to relax, the hand on his arm loosening.
He loved it when the beautiful man was soft-hearted.
Thump!
But before Tongrak could let go, Mahasamut instead slipped his hand between his fingers and held it. His sharp face leaned in to whisper in his ear,
“Or do you...Khun Tongrak...want to do something else with me that you don't want him to come along with?”
He loved how the beautiful man's eyes widened, how he squirmed, trying to shake off the hand, unable to fully curse because the damn kid was listening in, and once again...he was biting his lip.
It was so tempting he couldn't resist teasing a bit more.
“On the boat sounds interesting, but you might get seasick, sir.”
Ouch!
Mahasamut feigned a groan when he was hit with full force, finally letting go of the hand he was holding, watching the white cheeks turn redder and the eyes clearly showing excitement when he mentioned, “on the boat.”
Whoever said that the writer named Tongrak was calm and composed, he saw only a sexy man who was playful and eager to try new things.
Let's just say Mahasamut noted the boat idea in his mind for later.
“Who cares.” The man muttered to himself, embarrassed, making him want to laugh.
“Oh, really?”
Mahasamut nodded in acknowledgment, even though his large hand was now sliding over the white skin of the wrist with intent, watching the man who flinched slightly, making him almost want to change his plan from diving.
They hadn't done anything since that day.
“Hey, Phii, aren't you coming to dive? It's hot in the afternoon.”
Or should I change my assistant?
Mahasamut rolled his eyes when his dear little brother shouted from the bow of the boat in all innocence, forcing him to let go and instead throw the small anchor onto the boat with more force than necessary, making Palm jump and look back as if to ask, 'What did I do wrong?', but he just shook his head and turned to help the beautiful man onto the boat instead.
Once Tongrak was on the boat, Mahasamut followed by pulling himself up.
“It's hot over there, sir.”
He saw the beautiful man escape to sit at the bow of the boat, so he had to shout.
“It's my business.”
The person turned back to respond with a gruff voice, but then moved a bit further under the shade and grabbed some sunscreen to apply. His stubborn demeanor but eventual compliance made Mahasamut smile broadly in an affectionate manner, even causing Palm to whisper to him:
"Why are you smiling, Phii Mut?"
Thwack!
"Ouch, that hurts!"
Mahasamut smacked Palm's head in annoyance. Ignoring the whining, he sent him off to push the boat to where they could start the engine, all while his eyes couldn't help but look back at the handsome face that had now relaxed and was smiling, making him smile in return.
He loved seeing Khun Tongrak smile like this more than anything.
When a cat stretches out to sleep, it's cuter than when it hisses, but if you ask if the cat is cute when it's all puffed up and hissing, Mahasamut would probably say it's still cute.
"Turn around, I'll help you."
In the morning light that gently touched his face, Tongrak, who had just put on his wetsuit and pulled the zipper up to his neck, turned to look at the large man who was now fully dressed in his wetsuit as well. At their feet, two sets of dive gear were ready, one with a numbered tag, the other with a dark blue tag so faded you could hardly tell what color it originally was, labeled 'Mut.'
The young man immediately knew which set was his.
Tongrak turned his back to Mahasamut to let him zip up the suit, then took hold of the brightly colored fins.
However...if anyone thought Tongrak would behave well, they were sadly mistaken.
Splash!
As Mahasamut went to give instructions to Palm, the young man didn't hesitate to walk to the back of the boat, put on his fins, and perform a Giant Stride into the water.
"Hey!"
Of course, there were shouts from the boat, people rushed over to look, and the beautiful woman on board waved twice, donned her mask, put in the regulator, and swiftly descended into the sea.
Why should he listen to that guy anyway?
Then the cool water enveloped every inch of his skin, giving a refreshing, cool sensation, the sound of bubbles in his ears cutting off from the world above, his eyes seeing schools of colorful fish swimming through the coral, bringing back old feelings.
How long has it been since he last dived?
The answer must be several years.
Before, he was just curious why Connor was so captivated by the sea that every time he was free, he had to go diving. He took deep diving courses, got certified, and went diving multiple times. Being underwater felt good, but he wasn't as addicted as his friend; going that often was too much for him, damaging his skin and hair, until he finally stopped.
However, doing something he hadn't done in a long time also felt good in its own way.
Or maybe it was because he had been among people so much that he forgot this kind of tranquility.
No one bothers him. No one criticized what he was doing. No one to find fault. Now, there was just him and the beauty in front of him.
Maybe you're just getting old, Rak.
He used to like being around lots of people to mask his loneliness. He didn't like being alone in a house that felt too big and stifling. He enjoyed hanging out with friends, seeking entertainment in every form, until he started writing novels where Tongrak found he liked being alone, but only when he was working. When he stopped writing and all he heard was silence, it pushed Tongrak to seek someone to alleviate his loneliness, but this trip made him realize one thing...being in silence was also good in its own way.
Like now, he felt at peace.
Gulp!
Suddenly, Tongrak stopped kicking his fins, letting his body float in the sea. How did he end up in front of this dark cave? The beautiful world turned into a void, some hollow in his heart expanding as it always did when all sounds went silent, until he realized why he had stopped diving.
It was too quiet, too vast, it...
“Don't mess with me.”
Suddenly...the scariest voice echoed in his head...his father.
He heard his father's voice accompanied by his father's furious face throwing a bottle at him.
Crash, crash...
Where did the regulator go!
Tongrak didn't know when he had dropped his regulator, but as soon as he realized, he started choking on seawater, his hands frantically trying to find air to survive, but they only hit the mask, dislodging it, allowing seawater to flood in and obstruct his vision.
At that moment, he thought he was going to die.
No. No way. Don't want this. Don't want to die. Not like this.
Tongrak struggled for his life. He didn't notice the yellow line extending in front of him, didn't feel the touch that was shaking his BCD suit. Tongrak was oblivious to everything until...
Thud!
He was pulled back, and warm lips pressed against his, forcing air into his lungs until they were full, bringing back his lost consciousness, his eyes wide open. Even though looking through water might have blurred everything, he recognized who was in front of him...Mahasamut.
The person who had taken his regulator and put it in his mouth, waiting for him to clear the water from his mask. Despite being scared out of his mind, one thing he clearly saw in the now water-free mask was...the eyes that conveyed concern.
Those dark eyes, more determined and steady than anyone he had ever met.
The person who signaled with his hand, asking if he was okay, then quickly brought him to the surface.
He was safe.
Strangely, even though we haven't known each other long. Just looking into those eyes...Tongrak felt...reassured.
It was strange that when he looked down, the underwater scenery was as vast and silent as ever, but the warmth tightly holding his hand made Tongrak not feel the fear he had before.
A fear he never dared to tell anyone, and a fear that disappeared when someone was by his side.
Mahasamut grabbed a bottle of water from the ice box and walked towards the front of the boat where someone was wrapped in a large towel, the sharp eyes that were fierce when he noticed something was wrong with the other person, now left only with affection. Here was someone who boasted about being able to dive, now trembling, with a pool of seawater at his feet.
He already knew from KhunConnor that Khun Tongrak had a deep diving license, but that didn't mean he would let anyone jump into the water and disappear without a heads-up.
But...he couldn't bring himself to scold.
“Water.”
The handsome face looked up, strangely not whining, not annoyed, not retaliating. Just took the bottle of water, opened it, and drank, which made Mahasamut sit down beside him.
“Are you okay?”
Nod
The beautiful face pressed down once.
“You know, right, that a beginner shouldn't dive alone without a buddy. Don't do this again.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Tired already?”
“Uh-huh, tired.” Tongrak replied, then turned to look at the vast Mahasamut.
“It's quiet.”
“With the waves this loud, are you deaf, sir?” He couldn't help but tease, and he liked it when the beautiful man glared at him.
“Yes, yes, I know you mean the sea. I like it, what about you?”
He loved the sound of waves underwater, loved when the cool seawater enveloped him, loved the beauty he wanted to preserve.
“...It's too quiet.”
But then the listener paused, looking at the beautiful face that showed a fleeting hint of loneliness before it quickly vanished. It piqued his curiosity, but instead of pursuing it with questions, he chose to laugh.
“Should I go and bother you down there then?”
Startle!
“How can you talk underwater, use your head!”
Mahasamut liked that Khun Tongrak argued back.
“As if you never learned underwater signals.” Mahasamut made a hand gesture, which made the watcher turn his face away in annoyance.
“Forgot all of it.”
“Should I teach you again? The fee isn't high.”
“Troublesome.”
“Uh, I'm quite selective.”
The tall man laughed again when the honey-colored eyes looked over, and Tongrak turned his face away like someone who had lost an argument. Yes, he was shameless. Calling him troublesome didn't affect him; he wouldn't even care if you called him a scoundrel. If he wasn't selective, he wouldn't be sitting here having Palm arrange and deliver lunch on the boat for the beautiful man.
Mahasamut didn't deny that he liked this man's face.
The person who, once defeated, sat hugging his knees, turned away from him, shaking his head to indicate he wouldn't talk anymore.
He used to not understand the kids in the neighborhood who screamed over celebrities, didn't understand why they would call a man beautiful like that or act like a girl, especially when the kid was even younger than him. When he asked, the kid argued that it's the heart that makes one a mother or father, not age, leaving him, who usually had words, speechless. But now, he felt like he understood.
The man in front of him was undeniably handsome, yet he had an unbelievable beauty, someone who seemed bad-tempered and self-centered but had many unexpectedly cute sides.
At first, he just wanted to see that proud neck bend a little, but now he wanted to know everything about him, including the lonely look in his eyes when he was sitting alone earlier.
“Why do you call yourself Mahasamut? It's strange.”
“And why do you call yourself Tongrak? It's just as strange.”
When the quiet one started talking, the big man couldn't resist teasing, until the handsome face turned back, looking at him with irritated eyes.
“I asked first.”
True.
Mahasamut answered in his mind, then moved closer to the very beautiful person, reaching out to touch the damp hair, brushing it away from his face. He liked that his hand wasn't swatted away, only those beautiful eyes stared, seeking an answer, until he spoke about something else.
“Maybe so our names would sound good together.”
“Did you fail Thai language class? What are you rhyming about?” The writer countered, his face serious as the big man continued to play with his hair, slowly moving closer without startling the other, then he pointed.
His finger first at Tongrak.
“Tongrak”
Then back at his own chest.
“Mahasamut”
TongrakMahasamut
Mahasamut watched the pale cheeks, now tinged with a slight flush from the cold, because the writer, who was supposedly better in Thai than a southern boy like him, was absorbing the meaning behind what he said.
Tongrak, not just a noun, but a verb.
“Ridiculous nonsense.” The clear voice trembled noticeably.
Seems like it needs to be emphasized again.
“Khun Tongrak, it's me, Mahasamut...not Tongrak, the vast sea in front of you, but this large man named Mahasamut.”
He teased, hoping to see the writer bite his lip because he couldn't argue back.
Or perhaps to see him snap back in anger because he had climbed from being just a guide and a temporary bed partner to something more, or perhaps expecting to see a look of disdain indicating that someone like him could never be this man's lover. But no...
“Do you know that love is something people imagine for themselves?”
The slender figure pushed his hand away and stood up, speaking calmly,
“I'm hungry.”
After saying that, the writer quickly moved to the stern where Palm was setting out grilled chicken and sticky rice on plates.
“Perfect timing, let's eat, eat. Oh, Phii Rak, have you ever eaten raw clams from the sea? I'll dive down to get some for you, I'm telling you, fresher than this, you'd have to eat them in the sea.” Palm's loud laugh came from the stern, using the same type of equipment Mahasamut had used before, but this time the writer showed no more reaction than just accepting the plate and sitting down to eat quietly.
Meanwhile, Mahasamut could only watch, the answer still echoing in his mind.
It was his fault for making Khun Tongrak look like he might cry.
He spoke without thinking of the consequences.
The young boy clung to the hope that one day those eyes would look at him, those lips would call his name, and that embrace would offer warmth to his body. He hoped so much to receive love from this man, that he was willing to do everything...
Everything...
Tongrak stared at the last sentence he had left hanging with a cold gaze. He had deleted and rewritten it several times, but still couldn't get it right, not knowing if it was because he didn't like it or didn't understand it.
As a writer, he should understand the feelings of every character, comprehend all their thoughts, know what his 'children' (characters) needed, but once again, Tongrak found himself stuck at the same point he had never been able to move past.
Why do people have to do everything for the love of just one person?
“Funny.”
Not that what his character did was funny, but it was funny that he could write novels about love in dreams, yet he couldn't understand a single word of what that man said.
Tongrak Mahasamut
Why was he moved just by having their names put together, by a sentence that made no sense, to the point where the story he was writing came to an abrupt halt?
Tongrak rubbed his temples, pulling his gaze away from the computer screen to find...it was raining.
“Tonight it will rain, don't sleep with the AC too strong.”
Suddenly, the deep voice of the big man echoed in his head.
The young man got up to look out the window and saw that outside, a heavy rain was moving towards the island, the trees swaying with the wind, even though there had been no sign of a storm during the day, and the weather forecast had said the night would be clear.
He thought of that guy again.
“Must be my nerves.” Tongrak muttered to himself. He wasn't sure if he was scolding himself or the sea man who could predict the weather.
Rrrr
The writer jolted slightly, turning towards the sound of the phone, because only a few people could call him when he set his phone to do not disturb mode. Even his personal assistant didn't have this privilege.
...Phii Kwan...
The name displayed on the screen made Tongrak curious, but he answered immediately.
“Hello?”
[Where are you now, love? I came to your house, but nobody was there.]
“I came out to find a place to write my novel, what's up?”
The voice on the other end was his only sister, and if he wasn't mistaken, her tone seemed urgent, causing his intuition to warn him something was wrong.
As his sister fell silent for a moment, then asked softly,
[Has Dad contacted you?]
This time it was Tongrak's turn to be quiet, his grip on the phone tightening.
Dad...the word that brought a flood of emotions to wash over him.
“No. Did he contact you?”
[No, but Naa said she saw Grandpa near the school.]
Tongrak clenched his lips until they turned pale when his older sister mentioned his only niece.
“Perhaps my niece saw it wrong?”
[Could it really be him, Rak? Did Dad really come to meet Meena? Why would he do that? Why not contact me or you? And if he really did meet her, what would I do?]
“Phii Kwan! take it easy!”
While his older sister was pouring out her unease, Tongrak called out with such sharpness that even the person on the other end of the line fell silent. He took a deep breath, well aware of how easily his sister could be shaken, and how this matter with their father wasn't affecting just Phii Kwan. Even he, who was supposed to be the support for his sister, felt no different.
“If Dad contacts you, tell him to call me. If it's about money, he should call me, not involve my niece.”
[Should I call Mom and tell her?]
“Would Mom even care?”
[...]
Kwan went silent instantly, and if he heard right...there was the sound of held-back tears.
Tongrak ran a hand through his hair and said with a softer voice:
“You don't have to think about anything. If you weaken, how do you think Meena will feel? Tell her if she sees Grandpa again, to try to avoid him, don't talk to him, and call me or you immediately, okay?”
[Yeah, okay.]
He comforted his sister for a couple more words before hanging up.
“Sigh.” The young man exhaled, slumping down into a seat, clutching his phone tightly.
If he was defeated by Mahasamut, then the word 'father' was something he and his sister had lost to a thousand times over.
The only thing that man ever gave him and his sister was life itself, but what he wanted from their family was far more than they cared to count. His father was no different from a monster that devoured his life, coming back only when he wanted something, then disappearing, until Tongrak started to believe he could live like a normal person, only to be haunted again and again.
Tongrak...a name Mahasamut found strange, and its origin was even stranger.
Their mother named him this hoping that man would love her, to the extent that she named her son Tongrak. It wasn't just a hope for love, but almost a demand, 'Love me, Tongrak', and it resulted in nothing but family turmoil.
Once again, Tongrak asked himself, why do people need love?
“Love is just something people make up in their heads.”
Tongrak walked back to sit in front of his computer again, picked up his phone to text someone, then continued his work with an icy expression.
Love in novels is far more beautiful than in the real world, incomparable indeed.
…
Splash...Splash...
Boom!
Mahasamut rushed into the house, slamming the door shut with a loud bang, his large hands wringing the water from his soaking wet hair, flinging droplets all over the house.
“Shit, just in time.”
Not just barely making it inside before the rain, but he had managed to secure all the equipment before the storm hit. Besides him taking his boat out, there was another team with tourists on the other side of the island. After dropping off Khun Tongrak at the resort, he hurried back to help gather everything and secure the boat.
Even though he was more concerned about someone else's condition.
Mahasamut vigorously shook his hair.
The image of the writer was still vivid in his mind, along with the words that had pricked his heart. Then there was what that person had told him before, about this man having emotional issues, and today he could feel that there really was a problem.
Ding!
At that moment, a notification from his phone caught his attention. He picked it up to look at.
...I'll be writing the novel, no need to come tomorrow...
“Ugh.” The young man sighed, tossed his phone onto the bed, and headed to the bathroom.
He had just taken one step closer to Khun Tongrak, only for someone to retreat three steps back.
Mahasamut shook his head, turned on the cold water to wash over himself, but still, the face of the other lingered in his mind, causing another heavy sigh. He was beginning to realize he was quite smitten.
It wasn't like it was the first or second time he'd slept with a guest, but never had he thought so much about it like this time, even though he had gained both money and companionship, yet he still found himself oddly concerned.
“Mut, oh Mut.”
When he thought about it, something below started to grow larger, making him want to curse at himself. At his age, he was a young man with his mind often on such things, but Mahasamut worked tirelessly, chasing after money to live, hardly ever thinking about sexual desires. In the past, he only did it when someone else initiated it; masturbation wasn't even a topic.
But over the past week, he had to goon because of how often that beautiful man came around.
The young man sighed again before grasping his shaft. His sharp eyes closed as he thought of those lovely cheeks he wanted to kiss, the beautiful neck he longed to trace with his tongue, the soft body that his fingers could sink into with just a touch, the delicate frame and the sexy moans still ringing in his ears.
Crazy, man.
His big hand moved faster, stronger, with sweat beading around his face and being washed away by the cool water.
“Mahasamut, faster.”
“Take me.”
His sharp teeth clenched tightly, his face tense and serious, veins bulging on his neck, his hand moving even faster until he released the cloudy white fluid into his palm.
Mahasamut looked down at it and closed his eyes.
Looks like he was in trouble.
He...had become addicted to Khun Tongrak.
Chapter 9: With the Man Who Daydreams
For Mahasamut, the underwater world was no different from a second home. He had been diving since he could remember. He never got seasick, never got boat sick. He loved the still clean and pure water, loved the still intact coral reefs, loved the tranquility where the only sound was the bubbles from his oxygen tank mingling with the beauty of nature.
His mother said she shouldn't have named him this because he loved Mahasamut too much, even to the point of arguing with his father.
The young man let his mind go blank, allowing himself to swim with the schools of fish, but not forgetting to grab plastic bags and debris stuck around the coral.
Splash!
“Wow, Phii Mut, I thought you'd run out of air before you surfaced.”
As soon as the young man broke the surface with a splash, the annoying voice of Palm reached his ears, causing him to roll his eyes. He swam to the side of the boat and handed over the debris he had stuffed into a mesh bag to his crew.
“There's still plenty to knock you over the head with.”
“You wild man!”
Mahasamut ignored the teasing voice. He handed over the equipment before hoisting himself out of the water, sitting down to catch his breath.
“My phone, man.” He said, asking for the first thing.
“Like seriously, now you can't live without your phone.” Palm teased, still not handing over the phone properly until Mahasamut had to turn around and give him a big, wide smile.
“If I don't take jobs, I won't have work. No money. No wages...”
“Here you go, bro.” Palm quickly handed over the phone to Mahasamut along with a towel for his beloved brother to dry his hair. Then he busied himself with packing away the diving gear, leaving Mahasamut to laugh heartily and check for any messages.
To be honest, he was only waiting for one person.
...Tomorrow, don't come. I am not free...
“Did he just copy and paste this?” The young man muttered, scrolling through the previous messages with identical meanings. And who sent it? Recently, there was only one person, just like Palm had said, he was attached to his phone...Khun Tongrak.
It had been three full days since he said he wasn't free, don't come.
If it were anyone else, they'd be grinning and lounging at home by now. Instead of working, they wouldn't need to, and they'd still get full payment, but not with this person. Because even Mahasamut, known for his patience, was starting to lose it. On the first day, he let it slide because he noticed something odd. The second day, he thought it might still be okay, but now on the third day, after spending his free time checking the coral colors underwater, he received the same message again.
He was tempted to give him a good thrashing to teach him a lesson.
His thick eyebrows furrowed in thought. He hadn't forgotten that Khun Tongrak was scheduled to return to Bangkok, was he?
“Palm, back to shore.”
“Sure thing, bro. I was about to say the same. If we don't head back now, we'll be late for work.”
Mahasamut quickly shed his wetsuit and took his place at the helm, steering the small boat back to shore, intending to confront the sender of the message.
He didn't like the idea of the beautiful man going back home even a little bit.
“Where are you taking me? Let go!”
As the sun set, casting the sky into deep shades of blue, the capable Khun Tongrak was squirming in the grip of the wild man who was dragging him towards the parking lot. Was there anyone going to help him? No, because the man dragging him was none other than the familiar figure of Mut.
Tongrak thought irritably. He was struggling, shouting, and ordering to be let go, but the guy wouldn't release him, instead barging into his room, brazenly saving his work, snapping the laptop shut with a loud click, and then dragging him away like this.
“No.” The man who turned to reaffirm his answer with an irritating smile, then continued to drag him.
“I told you I have work to do.”
“I also told you, no work.”
Tongrak wanted to scream loud enough to shake the resort, forgetting how stubborn this guy could be, like the time he threw him onto a sidecar.
Until the writer, who hardly ever exercised, started panting, they had reached a familiar motorcycle, where Tongrak tried his best to plant his feet on the ground.
“Get on the bike.”
Thud!
“Oh, you crazy man.”
Tongrak planned to use the moment when the guy went to mount the motorcycle to escape, but just as he took a step, the big man turned around and yanked his arm, nearly causing him to fall backwards into him. He had to look into those eyes with a glare of irritation, one that would have made many people back off, but not Mahasamut.
“Keep your eyes wide open, they might start to hurt.”
He was getting angrier by the second.
His expression of biting his lip and looking angry must have conveyed something to the annoying man, who then softened his voice.
“Get on the bike.”
“I told you I won't. I have work to do.”
“Has the work been going well?”
Gasp!
It was as if Mahasamut was sitting in the room with him, because Tongrak had been writing and then deleting for three days straight.
This guy was probably just talking off the cuff, but he must have noticed when Tongrak hesitated.
And once he knew, guess what he did?
“Wow, you're stuck, huh?”
Tongrak got angry again. He was about to kick him over with the motorcycle. If it weren't for the hand on his arm shifting to interlock with his fingers.
“Let's change the scenery, and I promise you can go back to work.”
The listener hesitated.
“What if I say no?”
“Then we can play a staring game until sunrise, I've got nothing to do tomorrow anyway.”
He wanted to take up the challenge just to get it over with, but the sharp eyes devoid of any hint of jest told Tongrak that the other was ready to be carried off by mosquitoes together. Realizing that arguing would be futile, and staring would just waste time, he shook his hand forcefully and reluctantly climbed onto the back of the motorcycle.
Just a change of scenery, so he could get back to work.
Yes, that's the only reason he agreed to ride with him.
Tongrak told himself, but couldn't help but smack Mahasamut's back with full force.
“Stop hitting me, please.”
“Why...does it hurt?”
“No, you'll hurt your hand, and you need it for your work.”
Tongrak, who was about to reach out again, put his hand down, biting his lip in frustration. He didn't expect Mahasamut to speak with such...concern.
He was thinking about his own hand, after all. That's why he quietly held onto the jacket and went along, huffing.
Without the sun, the sea at night was as terrifying as a vast, dark void stretching out endlessly, and Tongrak would never have walked on this soft sand at this time if it weren't for the firm grip of a larger hand leading him along the shore, lit only by distant, sparse lights.
The lights from the resort behind them grew more and more distant.
“Where are we going?” The young writer started to feel scared.
Initially, he might have boasted about wanting to go quickly to return soon, but he realized he'd only known this man for over a week. Why did he trust him enough to follow him to such a remote, secluded beach?
“Just a little further. If we don't come out far enough, you won't see it.” Mahasamut said, leading him on.
Tongrak looked down at the hand holding his, wanting to shake it off, but he couldn't.
His honey-colored eyes turned to look at the sea, now just an expanse of deep black with waves crashing onto the shore...it was frightening.
“Here we are.”
He turned around immediately, but all he saw was a deserted beach stretching into the distance with no lights or people, which made him furrowed his brows in confusion. He was almost about to curse out loud, thinking, 'Is this what you wanted to show me?' but he paused when the large man pulled something out of his bag.
Mahasamut spread out a blanket on the beach and took out a small lantern, setting it beside them.
“Come on.” The big man sat down first and patted the empty space beside him, causing Tongrak to hesitate.
“Trust me just this once. I'm not messing with you.”
After a moment of hesitation, Tongrak decided to sit down.
Thud!
“Hey!” But just as he settled down, he was forcefully pulled down to lie back, causing him to protest, but the sight before him made his words catch in his throat.
The sea at night might be scary, but no one had told him that the night sky could be this beautiful.
Tongrak didn't realize how long it had been since he last saw such a sight. Or perhaps he had never seen it in real life, only in documentaries. Amidst the completely dark sky, he saw countless stars, twinkling like the purest diamonds.
“Do you believe me now that I brought you here to see something amazing?”
He wanted to argue, to retort, but the deep, whispering voice close to his ear made his heart beat faster. All he could do was turn to meet those sharp eyes reflecting the lantern light like stars, and he had to look away.
Mahasamut smiled to himself, then slipped a strong arm under Tongrak's neck, pulling him into a firm, warm embrace.
“Better rest your head on my arm, so your neck doesn't hurt.”
It wasn't just the warm body embracing him; the soft, deep voice was still in his ear, the clean scent mixed with the sea reaching his nose. Although Tongrak liked fragrances and had numerous high-end cologne brands, none made him feel as flushed or made his heart race like this one did.
It might not be because of the cologne, but because of this man.
He quickly dismissed such nonsensical thoughts and focused solely on the stars before him.
“I've never looked at the stars before.”
“Not even once? That's a pity.”
“Exactly.”
Mahasamut seemed surprised that he had agreed, causing Tongrak to let out a smile.
“Why? Don't you believe me?”
The deep black eyes stared at him, a large hand moved to cup his cheek, sending warmth through the gentle touch of fingertips.
“You look so beautiful when you smile like that.”
“...”
Tongrak paused, looking at the person who suddenly complimented him so directly, before trying to lift his chin defiantly, even though his cheeks were burning.
“That's all you've got? I'm used to compliments.”
Mahasamut smiled again.
“Well, I'm just an honest guy, so that's all I've got.”
“What's your point?”
“I'm just saying, you really look beautiful when you smile.”
Strangely, despite having been complimented many times - “you're so handsome”, “you're so cute”, “why are you so beautiful” - and many other remarks about his outward appearance, this time, Tongrak felt embarrassed, embarrassed by the simple, rustic compliment from a simple man, to the point where he had to look away.
Mahasamut didn't press the matter, just pulled him closer into a tighter embrace.
They both just lay there, quietly watching the stars. No conversation, just the sound of the sea breeze whistling in their ears and the warm feeling spreading through their hearts, which was enough for Tongrak to speak softly.
“You know, I used to be jealous when my friends talked about going on family trips, camping, stargazing, diving.” He suddenly started sharing. He didn't know why he was bringing up these old memories, but Tongrak just wanted to tell them.
“I've never had memories like that.”
Tongrak's mind wandered back to his childhood. He only remembered his mother crying out of frustration, his father who cared for nothing but money, people who would pay for love, and his sister chasing after love until she got pregnant during high school.
“My family isn't like others. My mother used money to buy men, my father lived off the money my mother earned, my mother was so obsessed with this man that she named my sister after him, thinking like a madwoman that my sister was a gift from him. And then my mother had me when everything was going downhill. People say my name is beautiful, but really, it was just my mother's message to that man saying he had to...come back and love her...That's why I have no memories of ever going on a family outing.”
He had seen people worship love all his life, and he never saw it work out once. Deep down, no matter how much Tongrak wished happiness for his beloved friend, he always thought that one day they would part ways anyway.
The young man turned to meet the eyes of someone who listened intently to every word he said, then he smiled.
“Why did I tell you all this?”
Mahasamut's expression was unreadable, leaving Tongrak to look away.
It must be...quite pitiful, I guess.
Puff!!
“Don't smile like that.” The big hand gently touched the beautiful face.
“Isn't that what you said was beautiful?” Tongrak tried to suppress his quivering voice. The wounds he thought were healed, leaving only scars, might actually be festering sores that would never heal completely.
While Mahasamut said nothing, and Tongrak couldn't read those eyes, the sharp face leaned in.
Tongrak thought he was being weak, needing warmth from someone, and Mahasamut just happened to be there, like he had been before. So, he closed his eyes, letting this man do whatever he wanted.
It was better than sleeping alone in the cold like many nights before.
Kiss!
But the man Tongrak thought would kiss his lips, instead gently kissed his forehead.
He opened his eyes, looking into eyes that were now very close.
“You said love is just an illusion.”
“Yes. Just something people imagine.” Tongrak replied softly, even though his heart was jolted.
Mahasamut smiled again and with a pleasant voice...once more said:
“I'm actually a man who loves illusions.”
“...”
Suddenly, Tongrak began to tremble. He didn't like this feeling at all; it was something he was unfamiliar with and had always wanted to avoid throughout his life. He considered getting up to escape, but the strong arm holding him prevented that, and the owner of that embrace emphasized the very feeling Tongrak wanted to run away from.
“Shall we give it a try, then?”
“No.”
“While you're here.”
“...No.”
His responses grew softer each time.
He had never wanted love. He had never desired it even once, but a small voice inside his head whispered a question...really?
You've never been jealous of friends who have love even once, have you?
But what are you doing with a man you're paying for?
Another voice answered back, and that made Tongrak feel unexpectedly at ease.
Yes, all of this he had exchanged for money.
“Huh, are you suggesting I should try buying love?” It was comforting enough for Tongrak to lift his head to ask with a look of superiority, insinuating that what was happening between them was nothing more than a transaction, so he didn't need to expect anything. Once this trip ended, their relationship would end as well.
As Mahasamut fell silent, Tongrak smirked and tried to push himself out of the embrace, but...
“Then try buying me first.”
Gasp!
The shameless man said it with such audacity.
“Let's give it a go, shall we?”
The sharp face leaned closer, not just physically closing in on him, but those sharp eyes were also making it clear there was no escape.
“And...and why should I try?”
The other man laughed softly, planting a kiss on the beautiful one's cheek, then moving to whisper in his ear.
“Or are you scared?”
Tongrak bit his lip. What was there to be afraid of? Everything was still the same, except his status had shifted from a personal guide to being his man while on this island. A few days wouldn't change him anyway. What's important is he was more comfortable with this arrangement.
The writer brushed off the fact that, “There are only a few days left, making my heart flutter.”
“How much.” He lifted his head in response to the challenge unnecessarily.
That was what prompted the large man to move closer, brushing his lips against Tongrak's, then nuzzling his nose against his cheek in such a sweet manner that it made his heart tremble.
And he replied with a pleasant voice:
“As much as you want.”
“...”
Two pairs of eyes met; one pair intensely serious, almost intimidating, while the other was afraid of something unknown. This pushed Tongrak to turn himself over onto the larger man, holding his cheeks to bring their faces close enough to feel the breath between them.
“Then do your job.”
This was the familiarity that made him feel at ease.
And that...
“You said it yourself.”
Kiss!
Mahasamut was the one to push up, pressing their soft, cute lips together. His large hand reached to firmly hold the back of the beautiful man's neck, pulling him down to meet the hot kiss that was unfolding. The warm tip of the tongue licked at the thin lips, and just with that, the person in the embrace shivered, the hands that were holding the cheeks now wrapped around Mahasamut's neck.
Tongrak was excited by this kiss, perhaps because they were kissing under the starlight on a deserted beach. The thin lips parted, receiving the hot, moist touch that delved deeper, sucking it back, listening to the low, trembling growl in the throat, just like him, he realized he was moaning into the other's mouth.
“Kiss...Slurp...”
The kiss continued to escalate, growing hotter by the moment. Although Tongrak was on top, he felt like he was the one being pursued. No matter how he tried to respond, the other kept pushing his tongue into his mouth, passing over his teeth and touching the roof of his mouth, making Tongrak tremble even more.
He even wanted something else to be rubbed inside his mouth.
At this moment, all the heat was gathering in his lower body.
Just as the tip of the tongue licked upwards from the sweet nipple, Tongrak moaned in his throat, the hem of the shirt he was biting became wet with saliva, his hands tightly gripping the thick hair, demanding more, until Mahasamut bit the mound of flesh, then licked the teeth marks with hunger. The large hand moved to pull down the shorts of the smaller man past his hips, just to slip between the round buttocks, his fingers rubbing against the tight passage that twitched in response.
Khun Tongrak was sexy. He knew that well, but he was even sexier when the slender waist writhed in torment.
And he didn't want to wait any longer.
Thump!!
So, Mahasamut flipped Tongrak over onto his back to yank the shorts off his white hips, throwing them onto the sandy floor with impatience, then spreading the legs wide to reveal the glistening flesh, the beautiful entrance clenching with each stroke of his fingers.
Then the young man reached into his back pocket, pulled out a packet of lubricant, tearing it open with his teeth, and poured it over the tight passage, watching as the pale body shuddered, the beautiful face flushed with emotion.
Gasp!
“Oh, ah...”
The long finger plunged deep to stretch the passage, feeling the heat of the soft walls that gripped every time he pushed in, the clear voice trembling with moans, accidentally letting go of the shirt from his mouth.
The larger man moved back to kiss again while pushing his finger deeper into the moist heat.
He curled the tip of his finger to swirl and search for the spot that would make the person in his embrace jolt up, then thrust with full force, hearing the sharp moan echo in his mouth.
“I always like hearing your voice for a long time, but not today.”
Mahasamut whispered, then thrust his finger in with full force, watching the person below him flinch and cling to him, mouth agape, moaning silently until Mahasamut had to press a heavy kiss onto those full lips.
At this moment, no one else would likely walk on the beach like they were, but it wasn't impossible.
“You...do it quickly...hurry up.” Tongrak panted, reaching to rub the large part in Mahasamut's pants.
“Take it out.”
Kiss!
“Be patient.”
Though the speaker was so aroused that veins bulged on his neck, Mahasamut still pressed heavy kisses on the flushed cheeks, comforting the one begging for his kisses, soft lips hovering near, the small tongue licking until it was slick, but when the larger man didn't proceed, Tongrak, who was lying there, flipped over in impatience and straddled him again, his hands eagerly pulling out the hot, hard member from Mahasamut's pants, his tongue licking his own lips in anticipation.
Tongrak even wanted to slide his mouth down on it.
But right now, he wanted it inside more than that.
“Condom?”
“How did you know I brought one?”
Tongrak ignored the teasing tone; if this guy had brought a lube packet, why wouldn't he have a condom? His pale hand quickly grabbed the condom Mahasamut handed him, tearing the packet open while his other hand was already working, stroking the large member, enjoying the heat he loved.
And he loved how the man panted, his eyes darkening, his face tensing in extreme arousal.
“If you do it well, I'll use my mouth next time.”
Tongrak said as he expertly rolled the condom onto the throbbing heat.
“Even if I don't do well, you'd still want to use your mouth on me.”
The listener glanced up.
“Or am I wrong?”
That was all it took for Tongrak to press a hot, fierce kiss onto the bragging mouth, only to moan himself when Mahasamut’s long fingers entered him again, pushing deep until the sound of wet squelches could be heard, his legs spread wider, his hips moving in response to the maddening sensation that was driving him wild.
He loved how Mahasamut played with his entrance, whether it was pulling out or thrusting back in with full force, stretching him until he felt like he might split apart.
“Lift your hips a bit.”
A large hand slapped down on his white hip with a loud smack, then squeezed tight.
No need for further words, Tongrak lifted his trembling hips, opening up for the hot length to rub against the deep groove, slowly, slowly taking in the heat that was pushing in...
Thrust
“!!!”
That moment, his pale face tilted back with intense pleasure, eyes wide, tears welling up, lips parted in a silent moan, his breath shuddering as the hot length that had been slowly entering now thrust in fully, scraping against the walls inside that had been untouched for days, making tears flow.
It hurt, it was overwhelming, but it felt so good he had to move slowly to adjust.
Thump!
He didn't even know when Mahasamut had taken his hand, he only knew he was getting accustomed to the large part causing him discomfort, when it thrust in again, reaching the tip.
Dripping wet.
“Ah, ah, oh.”
He tried to suppress his voice, but he couldn't.
The hot mouth burrowed into the crook of his neck, the tongue licking along his throat, causing his body to twitch, and the more he tried to hold back his moans, the more it seemed to spur on the man in front of him. Initially, the movements were slow as if to let him catch his breath, but for some reason, the pace grew fiercer each time.
The hot length was pulled out and thrust back into the hilt, and then the large hand...pressed down on his stomach.
“Eek, Ha!”
Tongrak buried his face into the strong neck, feeling like his mind was drifting away, left with nothing but the intense sensation traveling from head to toe, feeling like fire was burning in his abdomen, one hand gripping the sand tightly.
“No...don't...don't press...”
“You like it.”
“No...Ah...”
Even though Tongrak argued, every time the large hand pressed on his stomach, every time he was thrust into, the inside would clench even tighter, so much that Mahasamut could feel that every time he pulled out, the hot walls would grip him firmly, twitching tightly, making him need to scoop his hands under the round buttocks for support. Then...
Thrust, thrust, thrust
“Shit, uh, Maha...Mahasamut, ah, ah”
Tongrak tried to muffle his cries and bit down on the larger man's neck, but Mahasamut ignored any pain, his other hand moving to grasp the adorable part of the man in his arms, moving in sync.
The part that was pushing into the wet heated abs made lewd, squelching sounds, but at this moment, no one cared, only the bodies moving together in a rhythm akin to indulging in an addiction.
His beautiful face was contorted with emotion, hips trembling like a newborn fawn, yet still provocatively grinding, his body slick with sweat as Mahasamut licked the white neck. Below, it was just as wet, moans continuous until he had to push a finger into the soft mouth, playing with the moist tongue.
“Ah, kiss, smack, eek!”
The more he pushed his finger into the mouth, the more the smaller man sucked on it, until he had to rub the roof of the mouth with his finger, feeling the lower passage twitch, so he thrust in faster, harder, listening to the moans trapped in the mouth of the one being driven to the edge.
Thrust!
“Hah, hah, uh, hah, d-damn...wait, uh, it's too much”
The one in the embrace released his climax all over Mahasamut's shirt, collapsing against the body, and without hesitation, he was penetrated deeply again...and again, holding the trembling body close each time, reinforcing his own thoughts.
Khun Tongrak liked it when he was still being entered even after he had just gooned.
Lewd as hell.
This thought only spurred the large man on like a wild beast. He moved faster, his sharp eyes gleaming, his arms tensing with visible veins, holding the slender waist tightly to thrust deeper.
“Wait, ah. I. I just...gooned...ah, oh!”
Thump!
Seeing that the person in his embrace was exhausted, Mahasamut flipped the slender body back onto the ground, lifting the slender legs onto his shoulders to open the way for his large part to enter the tight passage, listening to the suppressed cries that forced the other to bite his own hand.
“I...hack, hack, haven't yet.”
“Oh, eek, deep, it's so deep.”
This night had just begun.
The sharp eyes gleamed before Mahasamut leaned down to the soft earlobe and said...
“Hack, hack, you promised to use your mouth next time for me.”
If he does well, next time he'll use his mouth...
“Oh, are you sure, hack, ha...that you're good enough.” The boastful Tongrak replied shakily, even as his hips quivered.
And that made the listener lean in to press a quick kiss on the flushed red lips.
“Just seeing your face tells me everything.”
The one who looked at him with drenched, lustful eyes, his body wet with sweat and cloudy fluids, his nipples swollen and sexy, causing him to thrust heavily into the tight passage, making the one in his embrace gasp in shock.
It seems like Mut is really addicted, isn't he?
“Can't, ah, can't...can't take it...”
“Don't try to escape.”
“Hack, hack, ohhh!”