Maybe one of the more profound things I have ever seen within scripture comes from a story that even non-churchgoers know. It was the moment Peter walked on the water.
Mat 14:25-31 ESV
(25) And in the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea.
(26) But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, and said, “It is a ghost!” and they cried out in fear.
(27) But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.”
(28) And Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.”
(29) He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus.
(30) But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.”
(31) Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”
A brother was pointing out something about this passage that had caught his eye. Peter was "beginning to sink". Unlike every depiction and painting we have ever seen of what this event might have looked like, Peter never went under. It wasn't his hand sticking up out of the waves, grasping for anything or anyone. No, he BEGAN to sink. This is what happens, isn't it? We lose track of Him. We stop staring at Him and our attention is captured elsewhere. Before we even realize it, our feet are wet, then our ankles. And it's the shock, I think, that is scariest to us. Oh no I'm sinking!! HELP!
And Jesus responds to that prayer every time. The HELP prayer. His hand always steadies us and we are again eye-to-eye. But... then the question: why did you doubt? Have you ever asked yourself, who was Peter doubting? The defacto response is - Jesus. Peter was doubting Jesus. Only Jesus wasn't sinking. Jesus was fine. Jesus hadn't moved. Peter had moved! He had moved his eyes from the Saviour and his being began to spiral downward. Peter had lost faith in Himself. "Peter, why did you doubt yourself when you saw the size of the waves? Did they keep you from getting out of the boat?"
Another clue can be gleaned from scripture regarding this thought.
Mar 6:48-49 ESV
(48) And he saw that they were making headway painfully, for the wind was against them. And about the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea. He meant to pass by them,
(49) but when they saw him walking on the sea they thought it was a ghost, and cried out...
Wait, what? "He meant to pass by them"? He SAW they were making headway painfully. He SAW the wind was against them. And He meant to pass them? Why?
Because Jesus believes in YOU.
Yes, things are not easy. Yes, the winds are against you. Yes, you cry yourself to sleep sometimes, but you are making progress! He knows you are not in danger. He also knows you are called to be just like Him. Hang in there. Don't ruin the moment of faith by calling out in fear and making Him turn aside, because that's what we tend to do when the winds come up. Jesus help! And He comes, and we feel wonderful because He answered our prayer - because He does. But we failed the test of faith. Another opportunity to grit it out and do what He told us to do fell to a defeat disguised as a victory: "He heard me and answered my prayer! I must be highly favored!" Highly favored? Yes, indeed. But still very immature and constantly needing rescue. All of us can grow in this area. Being a son or daughter sometimes looks like another mile to row with salt water blowing in our face.
