The Perils of Parasocial Relationships by Regina Singleton
*Image Description- The artist Beyonce sits upon a silver horse with a black background.
“One of the striking characteristics of the new mass media — radio, television, and the movies — is that they give the illusion of face-to-face relationship with the performer. The conditions of response to the performer are analogous to those in a primary group. The most remote and illustrious men are met as if they were in the circle of one’s peers; the same is true of a character in a story who comes to life in these media in an especially vivid and arresting way. We propose to call this seeming face-to-face relationship between spectator and performer a para-social relationship.” -Excerpt from Mass Communication and Para-Social Interaction: Observations on Intimacy at a Distance
Parasocial relationships and why we form them
The concept of parasocial relationships was first introduced in 1956 by sociologists Donald Horton and Richard Wohl in their article “Mass Communication and Para-Social Interaction.” The article focuses on a study of how people interacted with television, which was still relatively new at the time, as well as radio and movies. Horton and Wohl found that despite not being in the vicinity of the performer participant’s perception of the performer mirrored that of real interactions and thus audience members found themselves relating to the performer in the same way as they would a peer standing right in front of them. The audience were unable to separate the person from the performer. The intensity of the bond even increased if the performance was particularly compelling. The sociologists named these types of interactions parasocial bonds.
*Image Description- An animated brain with arrows pointing to the prefrontal cortex,nucleus accumbens, and VTA.
As humans our brains are hard-wired to seek out others and form social bonds. The way our ancestors bonded with one another was critical to the evolution and survival of our species. Our brains have evolved to assess the emotional states of others based on a variety of factors ranging from facial expressions, the tenor of our voices, and even body language. The complex process by which we interact with one another acts as a way to determine who is safe and who is not.
Having a positive interaction activates the pleasure center in our brains known as the central amygdala which contains the largest concentration of dopamine fibers. While a negative interaction can result in physical pain or even activate our flight or fight response. Considering how our brains respond to people we view as positive it’s understandable that we attempt to form bonds with celebrities that we like. Although forming parasocial bonds is normal they can quickly become unhealthy for both the spectator and the performer.
Parasocial bonds in the age of social media and rapidly evolving technology
*Image Description- A blonde woman sits in front of a camera smiling. In the background is a shelf of cosmetics and a freestanding closet.
“Para-social relations may be governed by little or no sense of obligation, effort, or responsibility on the part of the spectator. He is free to withdraw at any moment.”
Para-social relationships have historically been one-sided. Before the existence of social media fans had little interaction with celebrities outside of concerts, traditional forms of media and events such as book signings or meet and greets. Events that were rare and highly regulated. However, social media platforms have introduced the rise of a new type of celebrity: The influencer.
Influencers are people who have built a large fan base in their specific niche. Typically they create content either about their daily lives or their interests. This could be a young woman on YouTube who makes videos about makeup tutorials and shopping hauls. A high school twitch streamer recording themselves playing video games. Or a tik toker who makes comedic skits. No matter the platform or the focus of the influencer they’re able to interact directly with their audience and have their audience interact directly with them whenever they post. This has allowed ordinary people to achieve fame, status, and wealth while circumventing traditional modes of pursuing stardom such as going on auditions, taking acting lessons, or networking among established people in the entertainment industry. While breaking down the traditional barriers of Hollywood has brought success to many it also means that the insulation offered by traditional fame is virtually nonexistent.
In the past if audience members wanted to know more about their favorite celebrity they had to wait for interviews, buy their books, or join fan clubs with other like-minded individuals who idolized that particular celebrity. There were clear boundaries between the celebrity’s on screen persona and the real human being behind it. However, those lines are becoming blurred or in some cases ceasing to exist at all. Many influencers discuss their daily lives in vivid detail. The challenges they face, exciting milestones they have achieved, personal traumas, or even their favorite meals and hobbies. Instead of going on a movie set to film for a few weeks they set up home studios or incorporate filming equipment into their everyday lives. Essentially making their entire lives into content.
This lack of clear boundaries presents a variety of new problems. When your entire life becomes work it can be hard to turn it off which puts pressure on content creators to make every moment, no matter how personal or mundane, into content. When your livelihood is dependent upon you documenting your very existence, not doing so could mean losing out on revenue or losing ground with your audience. It is not uncommon for content creators to lose followers if they decide to take a break. As spectators, audience members are under no obligation to continue on with an influencer’s content once they become bored with them.
Parasocial bonding also means that influencers are just as susceptible to building them with their audience as their audience is to forming that bond with the creator. Which means they can also suffer from a one-sided bonding experience. This presents itself when creators lose subscribers either due to lack of posting, pivoting to new topics, or boredom among their audience. Our brains process this as rejection. When your content is based on you or your life this often feels like rejection of one’s self and not merely a rejection of the content.
*Image Description- Taylor Swift on stage wearing a striped black and purple one piece while holding a microphone.
Another way parasocial relationships have evolved in the age of social media is with the rise of stan culture. The word “stan” was first introduced in the early 2000’s by rapper Eminem in his song ‘Stan’ about an obsessive fan who eventually dies by suicide after the artists fails to respond to his fan mail. The premise of the song and video is completely fictional. However, it highlighted just how invested individuals can become in celebrities and influencers. Since then it has become a popular way to describe obsessive fan bases. Oddly enough the way stans behave isn’t too far off from the obsessive stan Eminem described in his song.
Many of these stans build entire online platforms simply from their worship of a particular celebrity or online influencer. Constantly tracking that celebrity’s whereabouts and giving regular updates about them. Making fan cams and spamming these videos everywhere online even when the topic has nothing to do with the celebrity. When a criticism of the celebrity is leveled it’s common for stans to come to the defense of the celebrity despite the celebrity not knowing about the stan’s existence. They often form in groups and pile on the criticizer by spamming them with insults, fan cams, and even death threats. In many ways the bad behavior of these rabid fans often eclipses the celebrity’s stardom.
However, stan culture goes beyond online insults. People sometimes avoid holding celebrities accountable for legitimate bad behavior because their fan bases are so hostile to any criticism of the person they admire. By openly critiquing them people can put themselves under fire. A great example of this played out recently when it was revealed in articles that the singer Taylor Swift owned multiple private jets. The articles put celebrities in a ranking system and ranked the singer among the worst of celebrities in terms of her carbon footprint. This behavior certainly isn’t unique to Taylor Swift. Many celebrities are guilty of having large carbon footprints due to their excessive and lavish lifestyles. While regular people are tasked with recycling, thrifting, and buying electric cars celebrities use private jets as if they’re ubers and employ sweatshops to make their wasteful clothing brands. As the consequences of human driven climate change are quickly catching up with us it would seem wise to evaluate just how much our favorite celebrities are contributing to the decline of the planet.
*Image Description- A screen cap of Kylie Jenner and Travis Scoot kissing in front of their private jets along with the caption “you wanna take mine or yours?”
However, Taylor’s fan base had a different opinion. Those online who chose to criticize the singer were met with the typical stan backlash of insults, fan cams, and threats from multitudes of fans piling on to their posts. Many of her fans scrambled to defend the celebrity by claiming her behavior was ok because the singer rented the jets out to other people. One twitter user even made a thread of Taylor Swift’s environmentalism in an attempt to silence those upset about her large carbon footprint.
Another example of stans defending abhorrent celebrity behavior came with the release of Beyonce’s newest album, Renaissance. For Beyonce’s new album she was resolved to make this her most socially aware album yet by putting collaborators through the MeToo litmus test. Refusing to add on anyone who had been accused of sexual assault. While this was an honorable move on the part of Beyonce she hadn’t bothered to get the permission of the artist Kelis to sample a portion of her 2003 hit song ‘Milkshake’ which appeared in the Renaissance song ‘Energy’. Kelis has been very open about how the Neptunes, which includes artists Pharrell Williams and Chad Hugo, tricked her out of the rights to her songs and for years have been using them without so much as asking her. It must have felt like a slap in the face to see a fellow Black, female artist doing the same.
When Kelis expressed disappointment that Beyonce couldn’t even be bothered to call and inform her that she would sample her music, Beyonce stans came out of the woodwork to admonish Kelis. Along with the typical, toxic stan behavior they went out of their way to diminish Kelis’s accusation by saying Beyonce only sampled a small portion of the song. Some claimed Beyonce sampling Kelis’s song without her permission was her way of showing respect for the artist. The general consensus was that Kelis should be grateful to have her art stolen by Beyonce. That she should be grateful that Beyonce even knows who she is. Not only is this a form of gas lighting but it’s disingenuous. Anyone who was paying attention to the Hip-Hop industry in the early 2000’s knows just how significant Kelis was to the industry at that time. Many of the same people today claiming that Kelis is irrelevant undoubtedly listened to her music during this time period. When it was revealed by Beyonce that Renaissance had been leaked many of her fans were enraged, failing to see the irony of the situation.
How to avoid some the pitfalls of parasocial relationships
The best way to avoid some of the negative aspects of parasocial relationships is to recognize that our brains yearn to form these bonds and approach them with a level of self awareness. Understand that celebrities are humans and as humans they are flawed and make mistakes. When we see someone criticizing a celebrity or influencer and our reaction is to defend them, stop and evaluate why you feel the need to defend someone who doesn’t know that you exist and who more than likely won’t face any type of harm from criticism. We must recognize that allowing others to dislike our favorite celebrity or hold them to account for bad behavior isn’t something that harms that celebrity.
If you are an influencer you should establish clear boundaries with your audience. Let them know that while you are grateful for their views you are still a human who has a life outside of your online persona. It is critical to establish boundaries within your own life as well. Resist the urge to turn every part of your life into consumable content. Take time off work to spend time with yourself and loved ones.
The best way to avoid unhealthy, one-sided relationships is to build genuine connections with people in real life. Parasocial bonds are more likely to become unhealthy when there is something missing from our own lives. When we are feeling lonely or isolated our brains are more susceptible to seeing these strangers as friends or attempting to live vicariously through them. Strengthen the bonds that you already have in your life. Volunteer to help those in your community. You can even find meetup groups with people who share the same hobbies as you.
Conclusion
Parasocial relationships are not inherently negative and in some way we all form these bonds. They only become unhealthy when we put celebrities on a pedestal or attempt to live vicariously through them. Our love for a celebrity should never result in us shielding them from criticism and accountability. We owe it to ourselves and our favorite celebrity or influencer to not form our lives around theirs.
Sources
*https://www.participations.org/volume%203/issue%201/3_01_hortonwohl.htm