"We must press further into the enemy's lair, if we are to engage it." said Aralina.
"But Madam Aralina, you said that ghosts were benevolent spirits with kind messages." said Erdi.
"That was before one of them put a dress on me and gave me an unauthorised hairstyle."
The opposite end of the corridor did not bear the attractive Aldcroft woodcut tiles Aralina had been so enthusiastic about. In fact, the walls bore nothing at all, except moss, and some unpleasant mushrooms.
They reached a room with rotting and slimy wooden furniture and musty stuffed animal heads. "Now there is something around my neck." said Aralina. "Was it one of these stuffed animal heads?"
"Perhaps it was the ghost." Erdi suggested. "He's over there."
"Are you absolutely sure it was not this mammoth? I would rather question this mammoth. It looks less insolent."
"My darling Aralina!" said the ghost. "You're wearing the jewellery I gave you on our wedding day!"
"He says he... Oh, but wait." said Erdi. "I remember. I was maid-of-honour when you married Emperor Pelagius Septim III. Twenty minutes ago."
Aralina said, "Then, it makes sense that my hair would have waves. Thank goodness. I am not a hussy. I cannot wait to tell my mother."
"Yes!" said the ghost. "You were standing in the sea upon our first meeting. You had got lost."
"I stood before you, wearing my bluest britches. I remember, you were quite enraptured."
"When I asked you why you were in the sea, you said you had been investigating a small village, in search of two women."
"You said one had brown hair, and the other had fair hair, and you were afraid they would fight, and all of Making would be lost if they could not agree on a single thing. Beautiful, foolish Aralina!" said Pelagius. "That must be how you stumbled into the ocean."
"If such a thing were afoot, don't you think my spies would have told me? But you insisted the women were real. You said one was already dead, and the other was sealed within stone. So I offered you my hand, and rescued you from drowning. You were ever so grateful."
"You agreed to marry him at that moment!" said Erdi. "I remember it too. I shall write a book."
"Only one question remained." said Pelagius. "How many children did we have? I seemed to remember it was twelve."
"You insisted it was only ten, and we planned another four for the next year, as all of them were so far imbeciles."
"I remember." said Aralina. "We honeymooned in the Black Marsh that very day. That is where you gave me this necklace."
Pelagius nodded. "You were angry, because you said it was all spiders. I said, everything is spiders. Since the lady in the corridors drove away my dinner guests, everything has just been spiders. Spiders spiders spiders. How tiresome."
"As we walked to Morrowind, to explode the Red Mountain, as was my beautiful bride's desire, you told me all about a person called the Second Archivist."
"And how she would always cut off her own head, if somebody else needed one, and grow another two in its place. It was a very interesting story."
"I told you all about how I invented grass."
"You were bright-eyed and hanging on my every word. Truly it was a marvellous holiday. I hope we have another tomorrow."
"Inventing grass was very intelligent, Your Imperial Majesty." said Erdi.
"Quiet." said Pelagius. "I thought I gave you a shoe to play with."
"It is a shame that the lady in the corridors did not come on holiday with us." the ghost went on. "The whole thing was her idea. She said we would make a perfect couple, if only I could persuade you that we had always been together."
"And I owe her the happiness I have with you, dearest Aralina!"
"Are you still speaking about Lady Flyte?" said Aralina. "I remember her. It was so long ago. In High Rock. No, it was only last week."
Emperor Pelagius Septim III twirled about. "The lady in the corridors says that I had but to tell you stories, and you would believe them. I am so glad that you believe me. Thank you for believing me, Aralina."
"You are welcome." Aralina said.
"The lady in the corridors is better at telling stories. She said she would teach me. But she says many things. Between you and I, Aralina, I think she's the biggest liar in all of Making!"
Erdi thought hard. The way from the Black Marsh to Morrowind was thick with mosquitoes. They were clouding her thoughts. She tried to remember what had been happening before Aralina's long and harmonious marriage to the ghost of Emperor Pelagius.
In a different wing of the Blue Palace, Second Archivist Eldaline was very annoyed.
"Are you quite certain of this, Jarl Elisif? I can only advise you to reconsider."
"Quite sure." said the Jarl. "I insist."
"Try to recall, my Jarl, who I am, and consider my position."
"What would your late husband, King Torygg, think of this course of action?"
"Torygg was very fond of you, Second Archivist Eldaline!" said Jarl Elisif. "Please accept."
Eldaline said, "No, King Torygg was not very fond of me. King Torygg despised me with every fibre of his being. I called King Torygg a Bootlicker to Dead Tyrants and he called me an Interfering Long-Eared Witch. I would crawl through a sewer rather than be within half a mile of your late husband. With the greatest respect."
"Oh, now that you mention Interfering Long-Ea... I mean, on a completely unrelated note, Second Archivist Eldaline, the commander of your security detail was hiding in the bathroom cupboard yesterday." said the Jarl's steward.
Lady Flyte was sitting by the fire. She was very happy.
"Of course she was, where else would she be at this time of day?" said Eldaline. "Jarl Elisif, if it pleases you, since I cannot make you see sense, and since my Ambassador will become involved if I refuse, I will accept, but under strong protest."
She turned as she stood in the corridor, though, and added: "But understand, I can be very unpleasant when forced into an undesirable position."
"And you will not like me when I am being unpleasant."
A palace guard called after her, but Eldaline did not stop. "Hello, Madam. Aralina went in the Pelagius Wing yesterday and hasn't come out yet. Is that normal?"
"Who?" she demanded.
"Flopsy." said Norqamerel the gryphon-handler, who liked to sit in the Blue Palace and read his books.
"Oh, yes, Flopsy Thalmor." said the guard.
"Good, good." said Eldaline. "She's probably practicing her Escapology. I'll go and get her in a couple of days."
In truth, Eldaline was only half-listening to everybody. A thunderstorm was amassing its forces in the sky over Solitude, the rain had begun and the peacocks were drooping. In the courtyard, Eldaline read Jarl Elisif's official missive again, and her expression was darkening faster than the weather.
To Second Archivist Eldaline:
You are cordially invited to:
the Heart's Day banquet
at:
The Blue Palace
on:
The 16th of Sun's Dawn
by:
Jarl Elisif of Solitude
Five-course meal with choice of soup, main course and dessert
Expect music, dancing, party games and other assorted fun
to be continued