It is a day that will live in my memory forever

Photo by Luke Michael on Unsplash

December has more holidays than you may think!

Living in the United States, we are inundated with “holiday spirit” that actually starts sometime around October but is ramped up to almost ridiculous measures by the time we are finishing our last turkey sandwich and cranberry sauce on November 30. In fact, if you frequent craft stores like Hobby Lobby, you can start seeing signs of autumn and winter holidays as early as July and August. (Crafters must get started earlier, as they hand-stitch, build, paint, and decorate the gifts they give).

There are two major religious and one ethnic/cultural holiday of major significance that occur in December, along with many national days of remembrance around the world where people celebrate peace, independence, or other achievements.

For me, however, one day this month; December 16, stands out like no other. It is on that day that the two most amazing men I have ever known died. One would say goodbye to this world sometime after 7:00 the evening of Tuesday, December 16, 1986. The other, two years later to the hour, on Friday, December 16, 1988.

George Dakes and Jim Latham, my paternal and maternal grandfathers. Personal family photos

Mentors, patriarchs, and legends

Books could be written about the two men pictured above and probably should be. Their backgrounds couldn’t be different.

Γιώργος Σταυρακάκης, pronounced “Giórgos Stavrakákis”, came from a poor farming community in Crete, a Greek island where, at the age of 14, (we think), he left to start a new life in America. His original plan was to return home, something that would not happen until 1969.

James Morris Latham, Jr., the son of James Morris Latham, Sr., a successful Mississippi trial lawyer and state senator, would follow his father’s footsteps to Ole Miss to study law, until he would be forced to leave when the senior Latham would die unexpectedly.

Since both would cut their educations short, they were determined to see that their children and grandchildren understood the importance of it. It worked. But being a good influence is much more than just telling kids to stay in school. It meant teaching my parents, who taught me, (and both of these great men taught me as well), about integrity, honor, a good work ethic. I was shown how to respect people, be a gentleman, and even through some of their mistakes, things not to do.

“The best way a mentor can prepare another leader is to expose him or her to other great people.” -John C. Maxwell

Pappou’ (Grandfather in Greek) did this by introducing me to the great people he knew. Some of them were hard-working business owners who like him, had some to America with little or nothing and had made something happen. They were all happy people, not because they had a lot of money, but because they had the love of family, friends, and they were content with what God had given them. He also introduced me to people like the leaders of the church where he was very active. The priest was not only the local clergy but a friend and counselor.

Granddad, always the Southern gentleman, told me about his own father, and introduced me to great men in history through taking me places in the community that was home. Fortunately, that was Washington, DC. It was a treasure trove of museums, statues, artifacts and buildings where great people either worked, had worked, or had done amazing things.

Photo by Sara Cottle on Unsplash

One thing that was amazing about both of these men was their utter humility.

But do they live on?

My work as a minister, particularly as a hospital chaplain, has put me in a unique place where I have discussed death with a lot more people than most. One thing that is certain; sugar-coating it is wrong. When people die, they do not, “go to sleep”. They do not “go away”. No. They die. It may sound harsh but even for those of us who believe in an eternal destination after this life, a physical life has ended. To that end, for the people who are left behind, the loved one is no longer there.

When I counsel people during these times, I think back to those two sad days when these great men left me. It is then that I realize that they still live in me. Not just my DNA. My character. My personality. The lessons that they taught me, I have taught to others. It is my hope and prayer that they have been passed on again and again. In that way, these two great men will live on forever.

If there is someone you remember in a special way, I would love to hear from you. I would also love to hear any comments or other feedback from you about this or any other articles in Living Faith. Thank you for reading.

Jim