Recently, an old friend sent me a message asking how I am. I haven't spoken to this person for a very long time. The last time I saw him was more than 15 years ago.
He then asked me if I am married already. I naturally just said 'no'. He pressed on the matter and told me that I should have long settled down since I'm already a professional. I said, "I am single and settled."
I thought that was the end of it. I was surprised when he started saying his doubts if I could really live a single life without a man. He even said that even 'god sees it lonely and wrong for a woman to be alone'. He started sharing about how big his children are already and that I should have mine too. I did not snap but I was in awe of the wonders of how utterly ignorant people are! (not to mention insensitive)
There's so much more to life than the society's linear construct of how a person should live her life --finish school, get a job, marry and have children. I believe these are all good things to do and to have but to limit a person to such construct is an insult to her being and potential. This is not the only measure of success and happiness.
People should seriously stop telling other people to marry and have children already just because they're over 25 or the “marrying age”. I see how some people mean well with such concern, comparing their happy family lives with others who are alone and free. Having the security of a partner and comfort of a family is not superior to choosing independence and solitude. Choosing the latter is not a loss, it is a fierce choice.
I personally value my freedom over anything else as of the moment. It would be a delight if I find myself in the arms of another in the future. But I will never bet my happiness and completeness on that. I am happy and complete on my own.
I am single and settled. Period.