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Going All In

Going All In

Dec 16, 2021

For three weeks now, I’ve asked myself just about everyday (I may have missed a day or two): What am I afraid of?

In the beginning, my list felt long and scary. I had SO many fears over the way the future would unfold and all the ways that things could go wrong. 

Today was different, though. 

I had three very short answers to “what am I afraid of today?” 

I’ve witnessed enough magic in this brief period of observing + releasing, that I feel so much more confident about how my future truly will unfold this time. 

I’ve been envisioning what it feels and looks like (without attaching myself too much to the latter) to earn six figures a year as an author and digital content creator. Leaning into truly allowing myself to feel successful. 

I’ve been publishing books since 2016, and the wild part is that at any point I could have  given myself permission to be a full-time earner as an author. It didn’t have to be so hard. I could have tapped into the energy of receiving all the readers, and opened myself up to the experience. 

I think I’m a great writer who can tell a fun story, and I especially think I wrote captivating characters and compelling dialogue. My superpower is in dialogue. Sure, I’m not perfect. I’m impatient and will breeze past certain necessary parts of the production process and will regret it later. I make a lot of typos.

But I’m human! And if my worst quality as a writer is that I make typos…that doesn’t make my story any less valuable. But I was carrying the belief that I wasn’t good enough purely because I’ve made some mistakes with my previous books. I could only be deemed a success and receive all the readers when I produce a perfect book, free of typos the first time around.

I’m not even kidding! This has been my prerequisite!

The same goes with content creation. I kept giving myself physical goals I had to achieve before I could finally get paid well for the work that I produce. I had to be prettier, thinner on camera and blemish-free with perfect, white teeth and 100,000 followers before any brand would want to pay me well  to work with them. 

Since I’ve been feeling into the “six-figure content creator,” I’ve been getting more opportunities to work with brands and am being lead to what I feel will open doors to even bigger opportunities. 

I’m so ready to go all in on myself energetically. 

It doesn’t have to take a long time. It doesn’t have to be hard work. You just have to say YES now, and allow the magic to unfold in its own time. It happens so much faster when you don’t open your mind up to questions about you’re worth and the self-perceived “prerequisites.” 

You’re worth what you want simply because you want it. 

It’s enough. I promise. 

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