Hello Friends,
I understand I have been away for awhile and you're probably wondering what on earth I've been up to. Well there's been A Lot but I will try to keep things short.
One of my best friends has been Going Through It. His father was diagnosed with a particularly vicious form of cancer that attacked suddenly, and devastatingly his father passed away last month. His father and mother have always treated me as one of their own children and are among the kindest people I have ever met. So I have been trying to provide as much emotional support as possible the past year and some of that has also required me to be physically present. This includes visiting during shiva (Jewish period of mourning). I felt that this was the least I could do, and honestly I wish I had been able to do more. His passing hurts my heart, and I mourn also for my friend and his mother that they lost someone they adored and who adored them in turn.
May your memory be a blessing Jonathan, and thank you for the tea party.
Along with this after 38 years I FINALLY got my diagnosis for ADHD. I've been put on a low dose of Ritalin and the effects have been illuminating. I didn't think at first it was working until suddenly my mind was quiet. I had to sit down for a moment and let the impact hit me because I had been so used to having a constant stream of noise in my own head.
Suddenly I was able to start cleaning up years of disorganization and depression mess that I always felt so overwhelmed and helpless to do anything about because my mind just didn't know how to cope with anything. Now suddenly I was able to think in a linear manner and so much that didn't make sense before now did. I got a peak of energy and was able to start sleeping like a normal person instead of not being able to sleep until the sun had already rose.
Now I'm a bit more adapted to it and have started seeing about making myself a schedule of streaming/making soaps/and writing so I can actually have a somewhat organized life. Which means I'll be able to finally deliver content in a more consistent manner.
What kind of impact will this have on my writing style? I'm not entirely sure yet, but hopefully this means that I'll also be able to really organize my notes instead of having the digital equivalent of 1000 different sticky notes slapped all over the house.
Also I just turned 39. The youth are calling me a queer elder, but I still have no idea what I'm doing.
How are you guys? What's new in your world? And please remember that I appreciate you. Even when I'm quiet, you are in my thoughts.
-Neta