Don't Squelch Your Child's "Grit"

Don't Squelch Your Child's "Grit"

Oct 03, 2022

Parents who repeatedly tell their children they’re smart or talented might unwittingly be squelching their work ethic according to Stanford University psychologist Carol Dweck.

Shower a young child with praise for their innate gifts, and you’re likely to create a person who will frustrate easily when, perhaps for the first time, the work becomes a bit harder.

Once they no longer find it a breeze, they might quickly give up, assuming their natural talents have reached their limit.

Instead, try this:

Give meaningful, specific praise about the hard work that goes into his/her accomplishments.

For instance, when your daughter shows you a picture she has drawn, don’t say, “you’re so artistic,” but rather, “I like the way you worked so hard on this picture, and I love the blue you chose for that line that connects the two circles.”

That specificity shows you’re paying attention to the work your child put into the drawing rather than sending the message that she’s the next Basquiat.

The ability to stick with something is what will help your kids recognize later in life that having a job (whether a part-time stint at Chipotle or a full-time gig as a student) isn’t always easy, but overcoming the challenges and setbacks is part of everyone’s life.

This goes double and triple for teaching kids about money, investing and general personal finance principles. Lay a solid financial. Teach your children grit. And, show them how to stick with difficulties instead of relying purely on gut instinct.

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