Hello, everyone 🖐️👺
Yesterday evening, it finally happened. I turned in the second half of the book I was working on to my editor and with that came a cascade of emotions: Proud, dazed, light, giddy, numb... (I could go on and on).
Today is the first day I have woken up in ten months where I'm not running on High Alert Emergency Mode. And delightfully (I'm not being sarcastic here) Typhoon Jangmi is tearing it up outside my window. It just feels so, what? Appropriate? Spot on? Poetically ironic? The Universe telling me: Sometimes you have to tear it all down to build up something new. This is how it works, by the way.
(Actually, it's not here yet. Still a couple hours away. Here's short video from earlier this morning. Today I'm spending in my pjs, pot of coffee by my bed, books, journals, laptop in bed with me...GD! this is lovely💕!)
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So today I sit with this buzzing excitement for my New Life™. Because oof! has it been a ride and a half. It hasn't even been a full year, and everything has changed. The short version:
August 2025: I pitched the idea of a collection of Dark/Horror stories that I have retold or completely reimagined to my publisher.
Also, in August 2025, Daniel Noah from SpectreVision Radio reached out and asked me to join his network. So I was going back and forth with him on the contract. This was scary and hugely educational. All new territory there.
Also, also, in August 2025, I was actively working on my middle grade book (Legends of Japanese Mythology). Cover: Squee!
September 2025: I joyfully signed the book contract and the network contract. So much good luck. Then things got busy! Everything's coming up roses~
October 2025: Nope. Everything's coming up Milhouse (Old Simpsons reference 😁).
It all fell apart. Vague, but my long time-relationship with the love of my life was completely upended, curb-stomped, decapitated, eviscerated...you get the picture. I won't even get into all that, but I needed to find a place to live, fast. Miraculously (!), my in-law's house was empty (and had been for over eight years). Sure it was a gomi-yashiki as they like to call it in Japan (piles of junk everywhere), but it was something to work with and roof over my head.
Every day for months, I woke super early, spent mornings writing, afternoons cleaning piles of garbage and grossness out of the house as much as I could to make it habitable, then collapse in the evenings, try to edit. All the while, navigating huge emotional turmoil. Oh, yeah, and also focusing on writing longer episodes for the network. Trying to do a little something new and different with the show. Let's not forget packing. Trying to get internet connected to the house, gas turned on, etc.
December 2025: Managed to turn in the first half of the book on deadline.
Feb. 2026: Moved into new (old) house.
Today: The second half turned in last night.
There's a lot missing there. But that's the hands waving furiously idea.
It's not the first time the Universe has been cheeky with me and upended my life. There has been cancer, blood clots, and nearly drowning off the coast of Hawaii (that last one is so "me" it's embarrassing). Also, to a lesser degree, all those moves when I was a kid. In the middle of the school year, finally starting to make friends, and dad gets reassigned. It was really fun (this time, yes, drippy-gooey-angry sarcasm) when mom and dad decided if they didn't tell me about the move until the absolute last possible moment possible, then they wouldn't have to deal with my crying and whatnot (Hey, I'm an only child. It was hard to make new friends. #lonely).
BUT! I eventually learned that I got to reinvent myself in these new places (Alaska, South Carolina, Alabama, Florida, Nebraska). It was like the Ol' Slate 'O' Life had been wiped clean and I could become whomever I wanted to be. Studious? Druggie? Rock bassist? Martial artist? Scuba diver? Daoist/Buddhist? Wiccan? Photographer? Writer? Chinese, no, Japanese culture fan/learner?
And that's what I'm feeling now. I'm in effect, homeless. As soon as my mother-in-law passes away (she's in her nineties...) my ex wants to sell this land/house for as much as he can because weekly trips to Tokyo for years are expensive and he needs the money (Oh, look! More sticky-snide sarcasm, gomen🙏!). <-- actually, we're getting along better than we have in ages. He finally got help and is no longer drinking. But he still wants the money from the land/house.
Anyway, all that. But for right now, this very moment, I get to sit on a nice blustery day, right here and read and journal and write you. ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
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WHAT is next? WHO do I want to be? WHERE do I want to be?
The world is in a shitty place and we're all doing the best we can. And it's hard, so hard not to spiral downward into dark, spooky, utterly bleak places. I really want to bring little moments of peace to people (and myself), be that stories of ghostly fingers being lopped off (latest episode) or immersive recordings of rice field frogs hooking up on a hot summer night (Coming soon! #TerriblePunAvoidedBySafeSpelling). I've picked up a camera again and am very interested in photographing birds and flowers and bugs. I want to travel some all by myself and see what I discover and learn.
I have ideas for three new books, and my agent is keen on all of them (!), so there's that to work on. For the record, I'm so over ai -- it just makes me want to puke -- which also makes me want to pursue even more all the tinier real moments in life, the more human (or nature) moments. I also still have the house to explore and all the secrets buried here to uncover. I've been really wanting to slow down and read some old books, anything remotely spiritual or about life and living and consciousness. I especially want to find some obscure works that have yet to be translated. I want to feed my brain and spirit. I feel re-energized about Uncanny Japan and now I can focus more on that , too.
Anyway, all the above will absolutely be shared here (the adventures, the studies, the photography, the recordings, the discoveries, the travels, the etc. etc.). We can be a small little uncanny oasis in the sea of ever-escalating WTF? Because one thing I have learned this past not-quite-a-year, sometimes you just need to step back from the Overwhelm and find that tiny bit of floating peace and hang on tight.
And now, to check the weather, refill my coffee, and try and outline my New Life Trajectory ™. ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
I'll leave you with one last metaphor for life. I see everything in metaphors and synchronicities these days.
A month or so ago, I noticed a weed had somehow figured out how to get through the locked sliding glass door and into my room. I decided to let it go, see what happened. It continued to grow. Still growing. But along the way I was told by friends much smarter than I am, it's a wisteria vine! I love wisteria! And I know it's not going to work out that way, but the image of having a real wisteria plant climbing up my walls and blooming next spring, filling my room with that lovely fragrance makes me happy. Ganbatte, little plant! 🌿💕
XOXO, stay safe and well, Everyone （╹◡╹）♡
terrie