Keys to Resilience

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Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

James 1:2-4 NIV

I have no need to tell you that we are living in very perilous and gyrating times. A raging pandemic has scarred us far greater than we could ever imagine, taxing our healthcare systems, and creating mayhem in our global economy. If there is one word to describe the general mood these days, tension might be the appropriate word.

The apostle James opens his letter by encouraging his readers to consider trials of any kind “pure joy.” He went further by saying that good can come from trials. They are prosperous, he says, for as we go through hardships, our character is built.

Most of us deal with some form of a trial on a regular basis, whether it’s relationships, parenting, health, or work. Sometimes they can seem larger than life and other times they pester us like an annoying fly. With so much trials bombarding us, how do we experience joy?

One of the most famous and overused sayings is one that holds real truth: that which does not kill you makes you stronger.

If emotional quotient (EQ) is one’s ability to handle emotions well, then adversity quotient (AQ), coined by Paul Stoltz in 1997, is a score that measures ones ability to deal with adversities in ones life. Hence, it is commonly known as the science of resilience and grit.

According to an article published by the Harvard Medical School, resilience has many health benefits. People with high levels of resilience have been associated with longevity, lower rates of depression, and greater satisfaction with life.

So, how do we build the ability that enables us to get up eleven times after falling ten times? Stoltz formulated the LEAD sequence which consists of following four guidelines:

Listen to your response to adversity
Establish accountability
Analyse the evidence
Do something

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The American Psychological Association has also developed a plan for the general public to practice resilience. The plan aligns with that outlined in LEAD. The key points are as follows:

1. Accept that "change is part of life."

The only constant is change, said Heraclitus in about 500BC. Sometimes change arrives abruptly, other times it’s part of the natural ebb and flow of life. Regardless of how happenstances have dealt us the hand to play in life, remember that nothing is permanent and this, too, shall pass.

2. Do not treat any crisis as an unsolvable problem.

When something deemed as “bad” unexpectedly happens to you, you can still minimise its impact by reframing and responding to the crisis. The word “crisis” in Chinese consists of two syllables that are written with two separate characters, wēi (危) and jī (機). The wēi syllable of wēijī conveys the notion of “danger,” but the jī syllable of wēijī signifies “opportunity.” An accurate translation of jī (機) by itself would be “a crucial point, when change is about to emerge.”

3. Practice extreme self-care

Simply put, extreme self-care is about answering your own needs and feeding the very centre of yourself. It’s about valuing the needs and desires that emerge from your body’s wisdom. It’s about believing that you can’t do the work you need to do in the world — including taking care of others — without first doing the mandatory task of self-care.

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