I was struck by something I heard this evening on a webinar, something that really resonated with me.
I took death doula training with INELDA in 2021, but afterward, I wasn't sure where to begin. How do I know I'm ready? How do I know I can really help someone?
I told a bereavement counselor my concern, and she said, "We ask ourselves that question every day. You never stop asking that question. It just means that you care."
I was watching a presentation in which one of the panelists said, "We don't have to know everything. We can just walk in and say, how can I help you?" She continued, "Maybe it's not me [who will help], maybe it's someone else. But I can walk into the room and say, how can I help?"
Then, I had this realization:
Being a death doula is about helping to empower people. About helping them come to terms with death.
Another death doula might have a different answer. However, I feel we could all agree that caring for the dying and the dead is something that used to happen within families. Somewhere along the way, an industry took over.
The death doula's role is just as much a role of education (death literacy) as it is about holding space. About simply being present.
Thank you for being.
Below: My brother, Miles, and our mother.
